Most, if not all, of my friends and family drink. I have their support, but I don’t think they understand what drinking does to my mental health and how tempted I am to participate in drinking activities. So, I stay away. I’ve been struggling with loneliness lately. All I want is to find a group of people around my age who want to talk or do something other than happy hour.
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I started volunteering in the beginning of my sobriety. It is something I continue to this day. It helped me with my isolation and I was able to find new friends that enjoyed other activities. Change is uncomfortable, difficult, exciting and fun. I find I look forward to new things now. It’s practice not perfection.
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Get to meetings. There’s lots of folks there that enjoy life in sobriety.
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We frands
Lots of great things to get out and explore in the DFW area. Finding sober friends is hard to do but it’s not impossible!
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I agree. Just have to be resourceful you know?
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Me too.
I’ve been dealing with the same issue…and I’m likely much older than you are. But it’s really tough- I do know that going to aa mtgs and events, locally and maybe out of town is a great way to find my tribe. I’ve done it before in sobriety many years ago so I know there are recovering people living fun, exciting, fulfilling lives- I just have to go where they are to meet them.
One of my favorite social spots is the gym. I meet folks there, chat here and there, and sometimes build deeper friendships. And, nobody's tossing back drinks before hitting the bicep curls.
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I felt something similar to that today. Had been so busy lately with work and family but today was a day off without kids and I felt a bit like a loner. Felt bored.
I can totally relate. One of the worst parts of my addictive mind is how easy it is to isolate. Now, coming into sobriety I have felt even more alone bc I can't cover it up with drugs and alcohol. I'm 44 and while I'm definitely young enough, I'm just a little old enough that my energy clock tends to wind down quickly and I'm just tired and want to relax. It's hard to be older and sober AND single. It takes a lot of effort, one foot in front of the other, taking action to build up social groups and activities around me when my inclination at this age, is to do a lot less. Lately, I put a priority on meetings and meeting people that way.
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They don’t and won’t understand. Your instincts are spot on. Smart to stay away.
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I’m lonely but nothing is worse than the loneliness of drinking daily to numb out reality. Such I feeling of emptiness.
Wish you were closer to the Austin area.
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We generally make friends with people who share common interests. When we were drinking and using, we made friends who drink and use. And we hung out in places where ppl drank and used, so it seemed like EVERYONE lived like us.
My program suggests changing people, places and things. My solution was to re-explore things I loved as a kid. Outdoor stuff. And I meet people with similar interests. And a lot of them don’t drink. But the ones who do, don’t drink like I did.
So go like your life. Find joy. And people who like what you like will be drawn to you.
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I tend to just be really open about my sobriety with my friends and they encourage me. Most of them drink but I feel like if I can be strong and be a role model it will get easier for them to stop if they want. There is a sober movement happening.
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I have had the same issue recently. Feeling like I am being cut out of invitations to parties and events by friends. It is all good. Hang with your sober buddies on here
That is definitely a big area of struggle for me and a lot of people. It’s also an opportunity to learn who you truly are as well. Find a new hobby, and that may lead to other connections?
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Me too! I’ve considered moving there.
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I’ve been exploring my inner child as well. I just need to push myself out of my comfort zone and meet others who like to do the same things I do.
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