I’m feeling defeated. Started strong on Monday, then reverted to old habits the rest of the week. Don’t need pity. Need a good ‘ole slap in the noggin. I need a sponsor.
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What a beautiful statement, I was completely defeated when I got sober, surrender is the next step that I took. It’s ok and there are many people that have felt what your feeling. There is a wonderful life to be had if your willing to work for it and you are completely worth it!!
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You and me both ! Keep at it girl 
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Well then, get a fücking sponsor and stop trying to do shït on your own. You're obviously terrible at it, just like the rest of us. Got to as many meetings as you can, get a sponsor.
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Thank you for that swift kick in the a**!
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I completely understand I’m actually in the very same boat. The high I crave to feel good lasts but a moment then all the negative self loathing mad at the world thoughts floods in, is it worth it? No. We are better than that. Sincere hugs to you.
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hey relapse is ok because its life and it happens sometimes to the best of us but by doing something about it shows you've acknowledged it and that you've admitted to yourself that you want sobriety and need help with it and those are the first steps to any change. though I am not a sponsor I cant help you there but I do believe in you. find some new hobbies that you didnt do while in your addiction and go to na or aa meetings every week. try to make some new friends there because they share the same goal of sobriety. dont hang around the same old people and go to the same old places. those will set you up for failure again. if having extremely hard time then having a sponsor wont hurt you. have one til you can make new friends. treatment might not be a bad idea for you too. or if where you live is toxic to your sobriety then try getting into a half way house too. think of everything you love in your life that you can risk losing every time you relapse. I hope any of those ideas help you at all and I wish you all the best of luck
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Get a sponsor ! You got this !