My depression and anxiety are creeping back in the last couple of days. I'm not sure if my meds are losing their efficacy, or I'm just unhappy at my job. I've applied for other positions, but I'm struggling to find motivation at work. I work alone, I live alone. I may be getting a puppy, so that may help with the loneliness.
This raises a further question: Since my meds are a temporary fix, will I struggle to not drink once I'm off of them?
Please join some form of fellowship of sobriety. Meds and puppies and work and all the external distractions and fixes cannot address a problem that comes from within you. Recovery doesn’t come from quitting drinking. It comes from fixing the problems that you were using alcohol to cope with.
Alcohol doesn’t become the problem until it stops working. Remember the beginning? When alcohol made everything better? Those days are probably a distant memory.
Read what Craig wrote above! Doing this alone is horrible. Finding a few sober brothers to hang out with would make a huge difference in your life. Find a fellowship, get involved, and start living.
Sorry for not being more thorough. I have a support structure in place.
I attend two group therapy sessions a week that focus on substance abuse, one large AA meeting, and I'm starting individual therapy in the next week or two.
All of my old friends and family are aware of my issues, and are very supportive. I was fortunate enough to not have done any serious damage to these relationships.
I also have a number of friends that I made in rehab that I maintain contact with as well.
I tried attending a couple of smaller AA groups, and they are not for me. I will not be returning to those.