When you go through trauma in childhood, particularly at the hands of a caregiver or caregivers, you learn unhealthy ways of thinking - maladaptive behaviors, coping mechanisms, and ways of navigating the world. You did this because you had to. It was survival. What this means though, is that you often have to go back in adulthood and unlearn these things, because you no longer need them to survive.
It took months of consistent therapy to be able to identify these things within myself. I am still actively working on unlearning what no longer serves me. I heard someone say the other day, “your wounds will open and close many times in your life” and wow isn’t that poignant? In my experience this is true - and when our wounds are open, we are in our best position for healing.
I want to address one more things this morning - my choice to discuss my personal healing on social media. I choose to be real and share real experiences - always have and probably always will. Why? Several reasons. #1 for me, taking back my power and identifying as survivor and not victim, comes partially in sharing my story and knowing I had the resiliency to survive. #2 too many people suffer in silence, not knowing others struggle in similar ways. Some of us have to have the courage to say, I can share my struggle if it means others may benefit from this. There is power in togetherness. #3 social media often portrays a false narrative of everything being great all the time. I want to actively challenge this. #4 I’m proud of who I am! I’ve never touted perfection. My strength and depth of character comes from my lived experience.
Thanks for coming to my TedTalk y’all
