Thinking

Recovery
#1

I've had a brain tumor and brain surgery on top of my addiction, had brain surgery, got sober. You know everything is better when you're sober. I'll be 2 yrs on the 1st.
Went to neurosurgeon yesterday and they found something new in my 2 year brain scan. :exploding_head:it would be nice not to care right about now. And my mom said at least it's not cancer, well it's still a tumor and it's still in my brain and they drill my head etc

Friend said it will be ok, ok? It's already not ok
Ppl can't say anything right.
I wish ppl could understand
I'm in a support group
Thinking well, they know it's not the drugs so maybe I could start that again. Maybe I don't get it checked in 6 months Urgh

It's tuff and i will stay sober today but urghhhhh

10 Likes
#2

You've already been through alot. This is a scary and disappointing set back for you and nobody will know what to say because only you have been through this. It's just an un expected detour, you will get through this and be strong because of it.

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#3

Thank you.

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#4

Keep fighting. And if I may say on behalf of everyone here, collective love and support to you to.

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#5

What kind of tumor? Pituitary?

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#6

Brain, cerebellum it might not be a tumor. Are you familiar with tumors? Mine was hemangioblastoma.

#7

My wife had a pituitary adenoma

#8

Hi, Jessica Marie.
Ugh.
This sounds so tough.
I am stating the obvious!

People-never all, while too many…really stink at finding apt and comforting words.

Sometimes, I say -
That sucks…because duh.
So many realities really DO suck.

I cannot stand toxic positivity.
Makes realities worse.
A buncha strangers-self included are rooting for you!

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#9

— also,
Congratulations on remaining sober for close to two years!
Amazing.
Dealing with health issues and a brain tumor of all things-absolutely stinks…
I hope in the midst of this reality, stress…that you keep remembering how phenomenal you are!

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#10

Thank you and yes the toxic positivity down playing my situation, I'm thinking am I overreacting? It DOES suck. I appreciate the support because even though this is not about being sober it is reality and this could definitely be an excuse to relapse in the past it was my go to and in the past I was using while still on bed rest!! From brain surgery!! Crazy right? I feel like sobriety is not my problem, life is. It's nuts this is my reality. Using is not a option

#11

Do you know I have the poem phenomenal woman tattooed on my back? Thank you, I am kinda phenomenal - thanks for reminding me. I'm a bad mamajama :blush::thinking::upside_down_face:

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#12

Thank you for sharing this. Ya know, whatever drugs we might take they don't really numb our experiences, they just fúk our ability to process them. If the movies and TV shows and commercials said that, most of us would never have chosen them.

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#13

Thanks guys - support is a great thing to have- I appreciate all of you- good job everyone if your trying to be sober or sober 25 years , your in the right direction

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#14

Man I found a bag on the ground last week, I looked at it and threw that sh.. in the garbage, I didn't know what it was at first then realized it was a bag of regret and I didn't want that. - matter of fact I'm going to post that because when they passed that plate they should have said do u want some regret, because that's what it is.

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#15

I hope she is well now. Give her a hug for me.

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#16

…that is a kick a$$ poem, Jessica.
And ah, I am with you regarding the whole toxic positivity bull sheeet.
Yeah.
I have become more cautious about what I share and with who.

I am fresh from dealing with health appointments-( my anemia was kicking my a$$ - and there was one night…not too long ago )-where I was like, oh sh - t…am I gonna die?
One moment…I cannot see what I am typing…

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#17

-( continued )-
Is there like some uh, spacing thing/issue with this app?
Anyway, yeah.
OK.
Now I just became really tired so feel too lazy to type much else-har?!
Well.
Please keep us posted,
Jessica!

And right-the “ t p p “s - toxic positivity people…
Annoying!
And sometimes, all we can really do is - take life one second at a time…if that is what it takes to not feel overwhelmed, right?:peace_symbol:

#18

I just keep going 1 foot in front of the other, even if they're dragging

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#19

It has been years now. She is well

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#20

That's spot on for sure.