This has been a rough few weeks. My husband has been out of town and we havent been getting along very well the past few days. He went the whole day yesterday without talking to me at all after blowing up at me the night before for asking a valid question. Its a long story but he ended up texting me yesterday telling me he needed some space to clear his head and think about things. I asked him if i could still text i love you and goodmorning good night and he said yeah but of you do you wont get a reaponse. Its been over 24 hours since ive heard from him. I know i have 13 years sober this month but i havent thought about or even considered a relapse in a really long time but this week has been a roller coaster of emotions with all this going on and fathers day with my dad not being here. If i had something i probably would have relapsed. Im gald i have my monthly appointment with my therapist Tomorrow so maybe i can talk about these things with them. Why is this so hard and why dows this hurt so much!
I suggest an inventory asap. Where is the hurt coming from? Are you being resentful, selfish or afraid? If resentments, what part of you is it affecting, what is your part in it. Clean your side of the street because you can’t clean his. Pray on your knees to your higher power. And hit a meeting friend. If you’re having trouble getting outside of yourself, help someone else. Just for today 
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Play the tape forward. You have seen how it turns out at the end. Drinking never helps anything and will more than likely make things worse with your husband. Clear-headed communication is what you need. Stay strong!
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