This sucks

Mental Health
#1

Thank you Florida Medicaid. For changing laws that now prevent my counselor from being my counselor. You just destroyed my motivation and hope. My counselor was the ONLY person I could talk to. Literally the only one. I don't have friends. I can't talk to my family. Can't talk to my bf. And now I can't talk to the only counselor I've ever had that made me feel understood and not weird. In fact she made me feel valid. Seen. Heard. Safe. Comfortable. She felt more like a best friend vs a counselor. I'm devastated. My therapy app (Affect) said they promise to find someone just as great. But I doubt that's possible because I've had other counselors throughout my life and she's the only one I've connected with on this level. And it took me 10-15 years to find her. But I'm supposed to believe affect can find someone so easily ? Pft nope. I skipped group therapy yesterday. And I'm probably going to skip one-on-one tomorrow. I just don't see the point right now. Maybe after I'm over the disappointment and frustrations, I'll feel differently. But today. I feel done with therapy. And not because I've learned everything I can and it's time to move on. I wish. No clean time to report today. I ruined that weeks ago and haven't found my way back yet. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe next week. Maybe never. Who knows. God knows.

I just don't understand why there always has to be another hurdle... Everytime I clear one and start picking up speed. Boom. another hurdle. I'm sick of jumping over these obstacles. I'm sick of running this race. I just want to watch from the fan stand for a bit :sob::call_me_hand: pray for me

2 Likes
#2

Don't skip on any other meetings you have, at least keep them as place holders to keep you busy. Just go through the motions for now, ya know?

Also, get out of Florida. Florida hates women.

#3

Gasp, I could never leave my sunshine state. Lol but realistically I can't afford to :sob:

1 Like
#4

There's sunshine other places too haha

#5

Hey Jess there’s always going to hurdles in our lives always.. that’s something we can not control…life will always have ups and downs…what we do have control of is the ability to face these hurdles just like you have been doing and show them who’s boss.. show them that they will now bring you back down to where you don’t want to be.. who knows maybe your losing your favorite counselor is a sign that, “you got this you’ve been doing great. You can do this and you will find another to confide in again just be patient with the process. Keep going to your therapy classes. Who knows someone there might need YOU. For YOU have plenty of experience under your belt in which you can share with another person that might need to hear what YOU have say and share…in a world that is so dark it just might be the time for YOU to BE the light that shines the way for someone else…hang in there my friend.. stay strong and sober…much love

#6

Hang in there and attend as many meetings as you can.
It only improves if you’re sober, so focus on that.

Life is a series of hurdles and we all deal with them one way or another. If you’re an addict or alcoholic you don’t need an excuse to drink or use. Just stay sober ODAAT