Today should be my one year of sobriety...if you ask my friends and family, even my fiance, TODAY IS THAT DAY. Truth is I drank almost every single day this past year. I contained the obvious by rarely consuming over a pint of rum to keep somewhat control. 4 days ago after a binge and once again vomiting blood I am ready to choose me again! I'm not ready to be honest with everyone but want to celebrate my successes and share my struggles. Hope everyone is having a their very best day!!!
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I did the exact same thing, and Unfortunately a week ago I got caught. And I lost all of my family. I don't know why alcohol tells us that we have to have it. I love my Man and my children so much more than alcohol. So why in the world would I drink alcohol? It blows my mind!!!
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It is so easy to convince ourselves we'll stop until that one more drink turns into a fake celebration and cheers on 1 year, cough...4 days sober or worse the lie has no celebration but more a funeral. A loss of something so dear to us that we allowed alcohol to steal. I hope you are finding some clarity and have some access to what your heart needs to heal.
Let's both try!!
I know I can't keep faking it!
I want alcohol out life 
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Hello Kate, getting educated helped me. Try reading Alcohol Explained by William Porter and Gillian Tietz's website and podcast Sober Powered. You ca read the first few chapters of the book on the web alcoholexplained.com
Best of luck reach out anytime 
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You are so brave being honest. I believe you can do this. I had to get on antibuse. It doesn’t help with cravings. It makes you absolutely sick if you drink on it. I was at the point I just didn’t trust myself at first to not drink. I have been in your place throwing up blood ect. Also staying connected AA for me helps. Good luck !!
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The main thing is that you are being honest with yourself and the rest with others may come later or it may not that is your decision. 
The most difficult thing is stopping and then staying stopped when experiences what we view as good or bad happen to us or we do things to others. I appreciate your honesty not to this site or anyone listening, but mainly to yourself. That is a major one toe Infront of the other for progress. Attempt to not let setbacks defeat you and find out what works best for you. Be well.
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Thank you for the recommendations! Today is another day and I'm still sober! Any knowledge is appreciated as the thirst is at its strongest right now!
Thank you! I wish you the best of luck with your path. I know alot about what medical options are out there unfortunately haven't qualified with previous medical conditions. From what I gather taking those meds is no easy way out, different but just as hard. 
take care!
Those are incredibly kind words, thank you. I want to be the woman I'm seen as. If I can fake it this well imagine the fire I'll be sober!! Day 5 !
Sweets helps the cravings, alcohol is made up of a lot of sugar.
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Kate, your story resonates so much. I feel like we are similar drinkers. I imagine the shame and the hiding take almost as much of a toll on your spirit as the alcohol does. Thank you for your openness here!
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Welcome! I pray this is your gift of desperation. It took me years and pretty much near death. But the gift is truly that a beautiful thing. Let the miracle be with you. Prayers your way🙏
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