Totally fucked up! Why did I drink today after 7 days dry? I wanted
the buzz. I wanted to escape. My husband is fighting pancreatic cancer. Our lives are changed forever. Maybe I wanted to escape. Whatever the reason tomorrow I will not drink!!
Sorry to hear about your husband. Would assume you being sober there for him would be a blessing for you and him both. Hope you can make it.
1 Like
Praying for and your family. I feel your pain and struggle. I think you can be a blessing for your husband by being there for him sober. Pray for strength. God is on this journey with you! He will see you through.
Sometimes it’s hard to fight the feeling when it comes but it’s a good thing you’re letting it known to everyone on here
You did what we alcoholics naturally do. We drink to escape. Rather than beat yourself up over it, focus on changing how you react to what’s going on around you. Actually, try not to react. Instead try to “respond”. We react without thinking. We go right for the bottle as soon as we feel uncomfortable. Try to take a moment and pause before you react. Perhaps reciting the serenity prayer a few times would be just enough to break that automatic reaction to escape. That little pause can help you respond with a better way to handle your feelings. Accepting life on life’s terms isn’t always easy, but drinking never ever makes things better. It’s a temporary escape that only makes things worse. I’m sorry you are struggling with your husband’s health, but a sober you would benefit you both greatly. Regardless off the outcome, you will be grateful that you went thru this time in your life sober…not drunk. Today is a new day. Wishing you some peace and serenity today 
1 Like