^ this is what I was told after my relapse and my first meeting back 32 days ago. I’ve been excommunicated by certain individuals, hurt people I loved and made a complete and utter fool of myself. My insecurities and rage came out in front of people at my girlfriend’s little sister’s wedding. I let fear get a hold of me and I picked up on the way to the wedding after 7.5 months clean. I never want to feel this way ever again. The one saving grace is that in those 7.5 months clean, I saw that life can be different and that there is an easier, softer way. At this point I just need any advice from you guys. One minute I feel numb and broken, the next I accept full responsibility for my actions and understand the only direction is forward. Please help.
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I would strongly suggest meetings. You are not alone! As we work through the emotional rollercoaster we need others. Meetings are the way. We walk through fear with others. When we self-accept ourselves we change, we self-accept ourselves with others! Meetings Tyler, you are not alone!
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You’re not alone. Find that community that lifts you up. That’s what I am doing here, I felt so utterly alone even though I am surrounded by people because nobody knows the depths of he11 I crawled out of. I’m a teacher and I can’t share things that would ruin my career because I’m a solo parent and support my children…and I live in a small town. Send a msg if you ever need a friend. God bless.