I went the full month of June sober, then around 4th of July I relapsed and was doing so off and on until the 18th of July. Today is day 10 again. It’s been really difficult the past few days and I almost caved so many times, each day is definitely a fight. But I want better for myself. Meetings have been helpful and lift my spirits, as there has been a lot of depression. I always think I don’t have the motivation to drive half hour to a meeting, but always feel better afterwards. I know I need to keep going. The only thing that convinced me to go to a meeting instead of the bar last night, was when I called the Na hotline. I’m thankful for that. I would like to find a sponsor, but it seems as if everyone wants a sponsor, but nobody wants to be a sponsor. I will keep at it
