Well I'm having one of those drank yesterday and up in the middle of the night times. This is normally when I beat myself up in my head for being so pathetic but I know I have a disease. I'm actually really at peace right now because I have a plan of action. I drink because I haven't dealt with my past. I have buried it and I know that.
I am transferring to another gym that offers yoga. It's important for me to get back to practice and to keep busy instead of just sitting here. Gotta keep busy. So today is my official start day.
I'm familiar with this. Maybe to familiar. My x husband killed himself because he couldn't stop. Literally. So I have been realizing that I'm under a sort of spell. It's evil and I can feel it. I'm grateful that I can recognize this.
The longest I've been sober is maybe two or three weeks and I did feel better and I did think that I could again and nope.
Time to live!
