Don’t “push” it on people dude
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I'm curious why it matters to you what others do with their life?
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Also it’s mandated by courts. People associate meetings and the program as punishments because they’re given out that way.
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I've been sober for 2 years and I've never been to an AA meeting. There are other groups like Refuge Recovery, Dharma Recovery, and Smart Recovery for people who don't like the vibe of AA. In fact, the group itself probably isn't important. It's the fellowship. The sharing of stories and the understanding that we're not alone.
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I think its really important to recognize the portion of our readings that say “this is suggestion only we realize we know only a little.” because it truly cannot be for some people. As for me I go where its warm. If I don’t like a meeting I don’t have to go back. It took me a while to find meetings I like and feel safe in but I also had the gift of desperation. When someone wants it bad enough they will go after it. However members of AA are still people with defects and egos and sometimes it can drive people away : (. All we can do though is focus on your own journeys
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It wasn't for me, but I was able to do my own thing and was (am) successful. I do, however, definitely think there are people that 100% need it. I like to do my own thing, some people really need that extra support and safety net.
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Skot!!!! Love ya Brother! This is a great question! AA has no monopoly on sobriety or recovery. Not all of those who want sobriety are the “real Alcoholic”?as it states on pages 20 and 21 of the Alcoholics Anonymous book.
These pages describe the moderate drinker- one who can take it or leave it. Then we have the hard drinker- one who drinks excessively but can stop or moderate if their circumstances call for it such as ill health, new love, or new job. Then there is the real Alcoholic- one who get drunk at exactly the wrong time, one who loses all control, becomes dangerously antisocial.
Here’s what I get from going to AA- a new way of life, the steps are a design for living, I’ve become very open minded, Honest not only with all but with myself, willingness to look at my past behaviors, to take direction from others that are working this program, to give what was freely given to me back to another person who is still suffering and wants it.
I honestly took inventory of myself, wrote down my resentments, fears, and sexual conduct, and harms list. I shared this with my sponsor, I made amends to those I harmed unless it would injure them or others, I continue to take inventory and when wrong promptly admit my wrong doing, I practice prayer and meditation to improve my conscious contact with God, page 86 explains it best. And then I carry the message to those who still struggle by going to meetings, events, and sponsoring.
I also encourage those who I sponsor to seek whatever else they see they need to have a spiritual experience. This may be other forms of support such as recovery Dharma, life ring, smart recovery, church, NA, therapy, etc. Read books on spirituality and or recovery literature.
Again this is your experience, so get after it and experience it. I can’t do it for you. All I can do is share my experience with you be being honest and explaining what the steps have done for me in my life.
Some of us may get the spiritual experience or awakening quickly. Some maybe the educational type and take it slowly. As long as we are growing towards a spiritual experience with the willingness to help others we can recover from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. This is life or death disease.
I pray for those who are suffering to find serenity and to know peace like I have found in sobriety.
Thank you for letting me be of service. I’m a real Alcoholic and I have recovered.
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And of course nobody has anything to say about that
Personally, I'm an NA satisfied member, and I'm a big believer in the 12 Steps. I too had "the gift of desperation."
Back to the topic: It's not up to me to promote AA, or any other 12 Step Fellowship. It's says that in Tradition 11 where it talks about “attraction rather than promotion.” Which to me means “if you want what we have, then do what we do.”
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AA does not hold the Monopoly on sobriety, but it has worked for me and countless others.Focus on you and what may work.
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Being in recovery saved my life. I don’t come on an app when I’m half a step away from ruining my life again. Even though a lot of you have helped me and you’re all pretty awesome. I go to the people that understand where I’m at That can meet me for walk or coffee or just hang at their house because I don’t want to be alone. I don’t care what program or no program other people work or don’t work. I just focus on my own new lifestyle. If skipping down the street everyday keeps you from oding then keep doing it. I don’t have one program I have a lot of them. I don’t even like the term program I have a new lifestyle. Because my old lifestyle almost killed me.
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I feel like any statistics on this subject couldn’t be complete since there has been so little study in alternative methods to quitting. AA has dominated the scene for so long. We need more studies.
I definitely agree that people need people but I don’t think I need to prostrate myself before a god to quit drinking.
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I investigated and it did not seem like a good fit for me.
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Excellent metaphor!
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You can do this!!
Yes!!
For me the question will always be, why tell someone that they will not get sober and stay sober without AA or any other recovery program. Indeed AA has worked for many and there are other
options for sure, it all boils down to being dedicated to never drinking or using again. How they get there and what they do to maintain doesn’t matter. But what is off putting is when some say it isn’t for them, is the judgement, punishing, and condescending statements comes to that person and that turns many away, does that mean they relapsed? No, but I have seen countless people in AA state because someone stopped showing up that they relapsed. Some that’s new hear those types of things and they may not like it . Just like anything else, AA can be disliked and that SHOULD. be ok.
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Fair enough. Ultimately all that matters is that we find some peace and happiness, and help others. I can only do this sober. How we stay sober really doesn’t matter. I’m happy to hear other’s success stories with other ways than just a 12 step program. I used to only have one recommendation to those that seemed helped. However, thanks to many of you, I can point them in several directions. I bet we share a lot of similarities in the way we stay sober. We may label it a bit differently, but we are all family
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Most people do that daily within their own social media accounts. If every pic you see of someone is them in a bar.......
I agree with you wholeheartedly! In my recovery I kept relapsing until I finally found the love and fellowship from AA and I believe this has kept me sober for the longest stretch ever in my life and I’m 48 with 7 years under my belt! I always encourage it. But I also know that it takes patience for people to accept it. I too die a little inside when someone says AA is not for me. Only because this has been my experience and I have tried many pathways.
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