I used to be ok. I used to be happy. I can barely make it through the day. I can’t keep doing this
You can do it. Don't make through the day, make through this second. Sometimes that is all we go in us is one second at a time. We get stronger with time but at first, it is one white knuckled second at a time.
The only reason why you can’t do it is because you keep telling yourself you can’t do it. How can your mind, body and soul achieve anything when it’s told daily by its master that they CANT do it?
Change your mind. “I can’t” is fear. Do not be afraid of change, Embrace it. Revel in the wonder of what will happen if you do not use. We use to hide, escape, run from the problems we do not want to face. If you stand up to a bully, you may get your @ss beat, but you will have proven you can stand in the face of fear and say “do your worst!” That’s courage. Having fear but doing what needs to be done in spite of it.
Every time I make any progress I just end up back at day one
Are you getting involved in a program? We can't do this alone.