Why do people NEED to complain?

Recovery
#1

I hate when people just complain all the time... like that's their thing to do... I tell them their doing it, and they get p1ssed off, and others just let this person and all get mad at me for telling it how it is....

Shouldn't u tell someone u care for if their acting like a darn fool? Not in those words, of course, but if I was and people didn't like me for it, I'd be like w.t.f why didn't u say something... like telling someone they have a booger... awkward at first, but now they don't have a gross booger....

Darn its frustrating

6 Likes
#2

I totally feel you on this. I agree 100% with what you are saying. Complaining really doesn’t solve anything and it only hurts you more in the end.

1 Like
#3

And I realize I'm complaining about people complaining.... It's not the same, tho. :laughing:

6 Likes
#4

Right lol :joy:

#6

Are you simply talking about complaining vs. venting? If someone is complaining- I'd suggest you try to validate their feelings as they are mostly likely just trying to express their emotions - often of pain or discomfort. Also, avoid giving advice - that can be annoying. Or perhaps validate their feelings, then just change the subject. I really don't think people feel the need to complain :woman_shrugging:

3 Likes
#8

No venting is totally different... I think people are just wired that way... but it can be rewired.. just like my drinking... must have rewired my mind because I look at it completely differently now...

2 Likes
#9

Lol - gotta stay positive, right? :wink:

1 Like
#10

Yep!! I like your approach a d appreciate your advice :grin:

1 Like
#11

Are you complaining, Jay? Is that what you're doing? Complaining?

LOL

All kidding aside, I can't change anyone. It's hard enough working on the changes needed in myself.
I can't change people, but I can certainly change the way I react to people. I learned that in AA.

5 Likes
#12

I complain all the time. When I stifle my emotions I isolate more. Life isn’t fair but I strive to change things I can. I try to complain to people appropriate for the content I’m criticizing.

#14

I’d want to be told if I had a booger so… I think you’re doing the right thing! :woman_shrugging:t3:

3 Likes
#15

Amen!

#16

Just watch ur words wisely u kno? Ppl r sensitive these days..

#17

Came here to say this lol

#18

I was told not to focus on things out of my control. Stay in my hula hoop. It has made sobriety much more manageable. If someone wants to complain, it’s a them issue.

3 Likes
#19

I know that's right Jay
It's like I got a magnet for hateful attitude people and pets or something that when I'm not looking or at my weakest moment whamoo I get it .....
Can't reach for my clutch the bag or bottle and after a pounder awh I finna get you now
You know !
Just pray for them there sick they know not what they do and if you hit them they got toxic strength they don't feel it until sober and locked up ......

1 Like
#20

I like that attitude .....

1 Like
#21

It always hits me the hardest when I find a really good meeting and someone brings their toxicity, usually in the form of complaining, into it. I know insurance is a touchy issue for a lot of people, but therapy is a place to complain because you’ll have a professional there to guide you. There is also dialing 988.

2 Likes
#22

Don't talk to those people anymore?

1 Like
#23

Family.... can't run away... I'm just venting