Why is everything always always got to be about drugs and booze?

Sometimes I feel like quitting drinking and drugs is supposed to be a step into a new, healthier life… but instead, a lot of recovery spaces feel like the same world with new people. It’s still all focused on substances — either using them or not using them. The conversations, the environment, the mindset… it all still revolves around the past lifestyle.

To me, real growth should mean moving beyond that. Not just replacing the desire to use with the desire not to use — but replacing it with something bigger. A sense of purpose, goals, new passions, new experiences. Recovery should be about building yourself into something stronger, not staying stuck in the same cycle from a different angle. Or the opposite side of the same coin, still worth the same at face value.

Sometimes I feel like meetings keep people on the opposite side of the same coin. You’re not using, but your mind is still living in that world. I think we should be trying to become the “dollar,” not staying stuck as the quarter. We should be leveling up, not just maintaining.

I’ve quit before, and I know I can do it again. I’ve gone a few days clean here and there recently, and I know I need to fully commit — for myself, for my wife, and for the man I want to be. She quit a month ago, and even though things have been rough between us, I want to show her I’m not quitting on us. I don’t want to judge her or act superior; I just want to grow.

I guess what I’m trying to say is: maybe recovery needs more real-life purpose built into it. Not just talking about addiction, but actually building a life that makes you proud. Work, hobbies, goals, responsibilities — things that keep your hands and mind busy in a healthy way. Not everyone fits the same mold, and there’s more than one path to getting better.

Tomorrow is a new day, and I’m giving it another shot

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Hi Luke, I think that your post was very well stated! I agree with you that the focus needs to be on transformative nature of recovery. Otherwise what would be the point? I try to find meetings where people share how it’s going not just how it was when they were using. Sometimes those environments are illusive.

Where I’m at, as well as the treatment center I’ve been to, focus on building the new life. A good 12 step meeting should do that as well. A good sponsor should too. Cognitive behavioral therapy is a great focus, because if we dont change mindset and behaviors we will be stuck. People, places, and things. Keep pushing forward!