Being around family is such a huge trigger because they are a bunch of active addicts and alcoholics in denial. I feel like I’m going crazy. I’m 5 days sober now, and ready to fully accept the program. I have a sponsor, I’m finding my higher power, and I’m making friendships in the community. I’m just really struggling being in town with family now. I’m struggling to find in person meetings and have such a busy schedule between my divorced family and siblings in town. I threw my vape away today, my last vice. And I’m just an emotional mess and need words of encouragement 
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Maybe you need to walk away and take care of you. I’d rather be alone then be with my family
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Take frequent self care breaks. They could be a quick walk outside to take a deep breath, a trip to the bathroom to repeat the serenity prayer a few times, a call to your sponsor, posting on here like you just did, a zoom meeting. Remember, it’s your sobriety and your responsibility to take care of yourself. Don’t fell ashamed or guilty for taking time for yourself. It’s the right thing to do. You got this
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Jessa, I’m praying for you🙏. Stay smart and keep your head on the program. Get to as many meetings as possible.
My sobriety has to be my number one priority in life. Over family, finance and romance.
I’m here if you want to talk or have any questions
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U was told early on in recovery that you don't have to attend family events if it triggers you. Step away take care of yourself and heal and step back when it feels right. It does get better with time good luck you got this
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Have you tried zoom meetings?
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I had dinner with my wife's family. My Father in law, and brother and sister in law drink. I can relate. Have an escape plan, don't let your ride get blocked in. Have your sponsor on speed dial. If you need additional support message me here anytime. You aren't alone my friend.
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Not a good environment for any newcomer, somebody with time wouldn’t even entertain the challenge of socializing with active addicts and alcoholic’s! 5 days sober, head to an AA holiday alcathon. Surround yourself with people in the solution, not the problem! Family can destroy you, they just don’t realize it!!!
Stay safe!!! 
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Bless your heart Pray to your higher power
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@jessa358697 You're not alone. We've all gone through that.
CONGRATULATIONS on your 5 days of sobriety.
I'm glad you have a sponsor.
As for the higher power issue. Here's what helped me.
- Get out a clean sheet of paper.
- Across the top print, in big letters "My Best Friend is..." And write down the attributes you want in a best friend. List everything you want your best friend to be.
- When you're done cross out the words "Best Friend" and insert the word God/higher power.
With that list you just created a God/higher power of your own understanding... Now run with it.
You'll thank me later.
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Congratulations on your 5 days of sobriety. I too have a family that loves their alcohol so this year I packed my bags and spent the holidays on my own. It’s been a great time for reading, binge watching Netflix, daily hikes, self care, and reflection. Maybe it’s time to get outside and put on one of the stories on the Loosid app.
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You are going through so much right now and you are so brave! Be gentle with yourself and keep sharing!
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It’s completely ok to remove yourself from a triggering situation.
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