Yesterday I turned 55 and I regret not fully understanding the toxic situation I was in, a lot sooner. Those years I wasted worrying about all the years I wasted, now here I am getting high because I subconsciously hate myself for the time I wish I could have back, while nearing the end of my shelf life, employment and health wise.
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Hi Erik, please don’t give up before the miracle happens! It may seem really dark to you right now but things will turn the corner with a little time. And when that happens you just may see a shining bright light of what your future may become. It is beyond our imagination what the gifts of recovery can be, but you have to sit through the beginning, to get to that place. So, I encourage to please hold on, if things are bad now, continued use would make them worse, but if you can get through this initial period, start doing a little inner work, and let us love-on you, until you can love yourself more, Im certain you will begin to see the promises of recovery come true in your life! Wishing you all the best and much success in recovery!
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BTW, Happy Belated Birthday-it looks like 55 may be your lucky number, I hope so!
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Don’t bother looking behind, you are not going that way. 55 is nothing in the grand scheme of things. Those years are gone, lamenting about it won’t change what happened. That’s your addiction trying to mind fuk you to use. Today you gave in.. tomorrow you can choose to ignore the lie and do the next right thing! Keep your head up man! We got your back!
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What Tim said and I’ll add, you can influence the future
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