I’m at the point where something really needs to change I’ve been fighting a losing battle with my drinking. I have tremendous fear over my health and also realizing my wife and I have no real connection besides the kids. My kids are my world and I am terrified of leaving or hurting them in any way.
Can I do this alone? Or with just this online community?
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Have you tried meetings or therapy? I suggest you go to as many meetings as you can
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It sure didn't work for me for way too many years. Lost a 33 yr marriage and many other consequences of my drinking. AA has saved my life for a bit over 2yrs now.
I’ve heard people ask this question before. My first reaction is why would you want to do this alone? Why wouldn’t you want some sober friends to help you along this journey? Life is much more fun when you can share it with others. I suggest you get involved in a program. If you take care of yourself, the rest will be far better
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Are there “programs” other than AA? Is there a way to find people on this site that live near me so I can reach out?
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You can do it alone. If I did it, so can you!! I got myself into it, so I got myself out of it. Granted I did go to rehab, but when I got home it was me, myself and I. But you have to really want it. You must go all in!!
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Did you go to meetings after rehab or just went beast mode?
They suggested 90 for 90. I did about 30 meetings but realized it wasn’t for me. It does work for some though.
I’d say don’t overthink it. Start with rehab, and then you can take it from there.
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Go to AA. It’s a (free) fellowship of people who love you, not in spite of your alcoholism, but because of it.
AA is the single best thing to ever happen to me. I understand your reservations. It’s a club I never wanted to join, but once you’ve earned your seat (which it sounds like you have), avoiding it will just keep you sick.
What do you have to lose?
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Question is, how long do you want to wait to figure that out? Keep going the road alone if you want, it's possible. But d@mn does it get lonely! We deserve support. We deserve to hear from people just like us. We deserve to share the load and get to see different perspectives. AA isn't for me but I found other avenues. Therapy, supportive friends, peaceful routines, etc. I wish you luck 
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There are other support groups/programs apart from AA. there is SMART Recovery, recovery dharma, refuge recovery, celebrate recovery, DAA and more! If there isn’t an in-person meeting near you, try a virtual one! My SMART meeting has been such a support system for me.
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Group therapy is helpful to. Me. In this moment
You can’t do it alone. You have to do this for you first. I couldn’t be there as a father until I got Recovery. I went to rehab, I worked the steps, tried something different. I stopped getting in the way for once. I still go to meetings, I reach out and help others, which helps me. There are many programs out there as stated in the above comments. Find what works for you. Ten years later I’m still in recovery, now helping teens who are struggling with this disease. Continue to reach out. Find a strong support system. Don’t hesitate to reach out when you need help the most.
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It could theoretically be done alone. But what would the point of that be? Being a better person alone? There's no end game to going it alone. You need those other people in your thoughts, goals, and successes. They also help with accountability and joy in life is best shared.
You are the only one who can decide to get sober but community is a huge way to grow during sobriety. So ask for help and reach out. But ultimately no one can make you sober but you
Do you really want to quit drinking? Maybe you’re not ready. If I ask for help am I less of a person. Even if I could quit on my own is it better to ask for help and get there quicker? Maybe.
Just one word… maybe
I tried and failed. The disease is way to powerful. I’d suggest reading “how it works”. Chapter 5 of the big book. There will likely be a time you’ll need the group and help from others. It’s a program that’s worked for millions around the globe. I had to stop fighting that reality and be willing to let go. The most rewarding moments for me are now helping another through these moments. Been down this road myself
Meetings are SO IMPORTANT. Online SMART or AA meetings are enough. This community helps a lot, in my opinion. The point I believe everyone is trying to make is that only you can make the decision to become sober. To STAY sober. In regard to meetings AND sobriety, ONLY YOU CAN PUT IN THE WORK. It's not easy, it's not always, or even typically "fun." So ask yourself this, how much do you love your kids? Do you love them enough to deny yourself alcohol in order that they may have a better and more stable quality of life?
What is everyone’s gripe with AA? It’s such a transformative program. Even aside from alcohol - just the way of living. I strongly recommend it.
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