Today is day 150 no weed. Things feel harder now than when I originally stopped. Also day 28 no booze. I think the idea that things would be back to normal at this point, and the fact they aren’t is what is making these urges so strong again. I have quit much harder substances in the past which I am years sober from now. I never thought weed and booze would be the most difficult.
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I here ya. I think we have to make a new normal not the past one.
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Never thought booze would be this hard to quit even though it’s pretty much been my only addiction. It ain’t easy! Understatement.
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I think there’s a common misconception that your going to feel so much better when you just stop doing the things that are supposedly bad for you. At the end of the day whether we are sober or not, we are just who we are. But at least you know your trying to be a better version of yourself than the you that was high and drunk all the time. Stay curious and find ways to enjoy and question your discomfort, and remember things will get easier!
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Always there is a first day for good decision. One day at a time. Keep it up.
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What would make things better? Or what things would you like to be better?
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I agree. Best of luck to you as well.
Thank you !
Everything else in life is going well. I’m not even sure of what void I’m looking to fill anymore. I think my brain has forgotten how miserable the addiction part was, and now I feel like I’m missing out on the “fun” parts. Almost like a relapse would remind myself why I stopped in the first place. I don’t plan to though.
Thank you, fortunately I have a lot good going right now. I am just trying learn to be comfortable with being bored. Exercise helps a lot.
Booze is the hardest when it’s such a normal thing for everyone else. Wish you the best of luck!
I've been there man. The last time hurt like I went through a grinder. I'm trying to fill my days with things I either enjoy or need to do to avoid the boredom that leads me to forget the pain.
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It’s like the staples. You can stop these
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You are feeling stuff again. That is very uncomfortable for a while. Its a process of learning to handle ALL emotions, good and bad.
If you remember anything, remember this:. There is no emotion you can fix with a drink or drug - just postpone.
Those problems will be right where you left them, usually with a few new ones piled on top.
You need a new solution. I have found that if i start every day seeking an opportunity to do something for someone else, my life gets better.
Simple stuff:. Push an old ladies cart back to the coral at the grocery store; hold the door for the person behind you. Give a goody smile to a toddler and make them laugh.
Small simple joys of life set my mindset to a place where i can face lifes daily challenges with strength.
Repeat this enough mornings and an amazing thing will occur:
You develop FAITH.
Faith that if help others, helping myself becomes easier. You wont question it after a while. You will realize that its just true.
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There's a possibility that you're also depressed. Not having bad things doesn't necessarily mean you're happy, it just makes it easier to be happy. Might need to pursue some passions or talk to a therapist. I've had to maintain Wellbutrin and Lexapro for years now to even have a shot at being happy sober.
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For me, as I got older it definitely became more difficult. This LAST TIME, I am using ALL the tools available to me: meetings, sponsor, Steps, therapist, psychiatry, etc. It's working tho! I'm coming up on 5 years clean and sober this next month. I'm psyched!!
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I feel ya, I’m 4.5 months no alcohol but fell off the weed wagon recently. For me it’s my inability to process negative emotions and realizing they will pass. Talking with a therapist, family and friends have been helpful but I’m still working to just sometimes accept that I’m not in a good place and that’s okay. Learning to turn, face and process bad feelings is the hardest part in my opinion of sobriety so I’m with ya there
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I've heard it said that it's 10 mi into the woods and 10 mi back out. We didn't get this way overnight and we're not going to get better overnight.
This is the primary reason that we go to meetings. We surround ourselves with people that have been where we are at and they guide us along the way. I'd like you to read something that comes from the AA big book. This can be applied to whether you're doing alcohol or drugs or both. There are three key points in this reading
Why we drank or got high.
Why we couldn't stop.
And what is required in order to stop and stay stopped.
The Doctor's Opinion
Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are
1.) restless, irritable and discontented,
unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks--drinks which they see others taking with impunity. After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the
2.) phenomenon of craving
develops, they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an
3.) entire psychic change
there is very little hope of his or her recovery.
The psychic change is acquired by going through the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. The 12 Steps in NA are the same.
People who try to do this whole thing on their own usually end up relapsing sooner or later because they believe the lie that this time everything will be okay. But it never is, is it?
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Also
Life doesn't get easier simply because we stopped drinking and drugging. But rather we get better at handling life one day at a time. Congratulations on your dry time thus far but please try to understand that you are just getting started and it's hardly time for you to feel a great quality of life. It takes a little bit more time than that.
One day at a time
I've been sober over 8 years and I'm here to tell you that the payoff is tremendous!
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Jake, I feel it too. I’m 3 years sober from multiple addictions. My life is better but I struggle with the same things as you. For me it was 30 years of use nonstop, I’ve come to terms with the fact that I might never feel ‘normal’ again.
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