Has anyone been able to stay sober around people that drink? I go long periods of time sober but give in. I realize I am an alcohol and it destroys my life and relationships. I always think I can control it this time. Not! I get completely insane and it is harming my health. I pray sober online friends can give me strength. I don’t drink and drive I drunk text stupidity. Nobody likes a drunk. I just hate myself. The depression when sobering up is horrible. I hold a job and very normal until I drink. I have to stop completely and don’t know how. Everyone I know almost drinks. They just don’t get stupid like me. I don’t know how to have fun sober but being drunk isn’t fun either. Maybe when I get to feeling better I will try yoga or meditation?
The awesome thing is that you are aware of your relationship with alcohol. This community is a great place to start. Being sober is a true lifestyle change. That includes distancing yourself from people and situations that don’t fit that lifestyle. This is something I am newly understanding. It’s hard work but it is soooo worth it. You can do it Dianne, you’re stronger than alcohol. I pray strength and courage for you in your journey. Feel free to reach out anytime. 
Reach out to Cierra is my best advice🙂
Thanks. 
I’m 13 months sober and my boundaries remain strong in regards to not being around people drinking. Some people are able to quit and still be around alcohol - I’m not one of them, at least not yet. I have to stay honest with myself and still keep the shame at bay. I’m very vocal/open about my “limitations” with my family and friends, even my children. I just do not, CANNOT knowingly attend functions, visit friends or be in any environments where alcohol is openly around. I used to internally label myself as weak for not being able to “handle it” as my husband says (who can be ignorantly insensitive, but I don’t think he means the harm - it’s me who takes it this way). I now believe it comes from strength in vulnerability, that I know my limitations and I’m comfortable with them. My sobriety is sacred and I protect it.
Maybe someday in the near future I can attend a holiday gift exchange where wine is being poured all around me. Today is not that day and I’m good with that. In the last year I haven’t lost anyone that my heart feels bonded to - we just have to stay connected via these screens, and through phone calls/texts. This is my time to regroup and my loved ones respect that.
The best feeling in my recovery was the first time someone offered me a drink and I was able to say “thanks but I don’t drink “!!!!
Nope.
I attended a zoom AA meeting. It was good. People are so supportive. I am committed to stop drinking. My whole family drinks though. My husband and I have always went out and love the beach. Just not sure how this will work. I can’t force everyone to stop drinking. I just have to stay away when I feel weak. One day at a time and lots of prayer. I know my addiction to alcohol is not good at all
People just don’t understand why I can’t stop. My husband gets mad and says “Go to bed!” It is so helpful to talk to people like me that understand I can’t stop once I start. I just can’t drink at all. My doctor says “you don’t have an off switch”. It is truly embarrassing and horrible
Hi Dianne! You are not alone! We all have our own stories, but we all have the same problem. Our lives become unmanageable when we drink. Some stories are crazier than others, but we have the same problem and the same solution. I totally relate to your problems with hanging out with “normal” people. I got sober in 1989 and didn’t drink for over 20 plus years. Over time I gradually hung out with only “normal” people. I stopped going to AA. I stopped communicating with any sober friends. This went on over a period of many years. Eventually I was always the only one not drinking. My wife didn’t drink either went we met and got married. She was a health freak, but started socially drinking about 12 years into our relationship. I pretended it didn’t bother because I’m so chill and nothing bothers me lol. As life moved forward, I was the only one of all of our friends that didn’t drink. I was always the designated driver. I believe it really didn’t bother me at first, but over the disease was raging within just waiting for an opportunity. Anyway, long story short I took that first drink. The damage I’ve created is horrible. I destroyed my wife and children. Today I’m working hard on repairing my family relationships. This time around I’m taking more responsibility for my sobriety. I’m not going to “let” life just happen and go with the flow. I’ve already had to new AA buddies and their spouses over to the house for dinner. I’m introducing my wife to my AA family and insisting that we make time in our social life to go out with my sober friends. I can’t be living two lives. Both of my worlds need to collide (Seinfeld reference). A big part of it is having my wife involved. She’s a little hesitant about it, but she knows it has to be that way. She’ll never quite understand the AA program, but she doesn’t need to. It’s a work in progress. It takes a lot of communication and a willingness . There comes a point where we start to accept that it’s an illness…that we are not bad or awful people. As we do so, the shame slowly fades, and the peace and serenity take over. Find AA. Go to meetings. Find a sponsor. Go to some women meetings. Make some friends. You can do this!!!
Thanks Soberinsoflo. Lol. Cool name. Yes I definitely need to meet some good sober girlfriends. I need to learn how to have fun sober. It is gonna be hard but I realize I have to if I want to live.
Hi Dianne...
I've been sober since 1992, my career in the music industry put me in many environments filled with drugs and boose...old timers taught me tricks like...eat candy,drink a milkshake, disrupt your system before going into a party...its worked for me all these years...gene
SoFlo? I'm in fort Myers new 6/22 sober and don't know where to go. I don't mean to intrude on her post but trying to reach out
Hey Stephen! I’m sure Dianne won’t mind. We are all here to help one another. You m sending you a pm because the app keeps rejecting the link to the websites that have the info you need. Not sure why it won’t let me post it 
.
I would say stay away from it all together. Someday, when it is no longer a daily fight to stay sober, you may be able to be around drinking.
My morning walk and meditation set me up everyday for the challenges. I’m in the hospitality industry so I am still around it all the time. I remember what it does to me and what it costs me. Then I find a hard candy and focus on me. It isn’t always easy but it’s manageable when the alternative is concentrated on for me.
Hi Dianne I understand your struggles and fear the same happening to me. I am only two weeks into this and am trying to figure out how I will handle those situations when they arise. Meditation has done me wonders and am also looking for other outlets. You can do this. It's great you acknowledge what happens when you have been drinking. I too have made poor decisions and become someone I dont want to be. You will figure this out 
Dianne, I was never a daily drinker but I was a killer binge drinker. You state the solution in your text here. Simply do not take that first drink on any given day. Period. That's what works for me. Hopefully for you. There may be mild discomfort in your mind. But you can deal with it. For me, one is too many, 10 wasn't enough. Don't take the first drink.
Not to be a big book thumper, but AA can help you with your struggle. First, everything you described in your post you will hear in the rooms. People will help you understand your problem and the steps will help you work through it. Second, it’s a healthy non-drinking social network. I couldn’t hang out with my old drinking friends, but I needed friends. AA friends are really fucking cool friends. Once you have some sober time under your belt you can be around people who drink (kind of). I still set up an escape plan for any function. If I start to feel uncomfortable, I can use that plan to slip out. I can’t stand drunk people now. They annoy the fuck out of me.
Dianne, we all have to remember that we are strongest before that first drink. Our defenses are fully armed. After the first drink, we have opened the gates and have allowed the enemy into the fort.