I argue with people in my head all of the time. So badly that I become very angry and start arguing with the air. Does anyone else experience this and how do i get it to stop.
Especially in the car or at work(restaurant industry). I try and make it fun. Which sides wins and why. Lol
That’s a good idea, but I’m wasting my mental stamina with these fights. I want them to go away. I guess I’m going to have to hand it to god.
Totally feel that. The 1st week coming back (1st time I've taken recovery 100% serious, almost 50 days) I spent a lot of time thinking about the past, can I make this time, how long can I stay sober, who do I talked to? Still having a hard time mentally but I feel great and I can see the difference of the way people are starting to treat, especially my kids.
Trying to talk to "normies" about the mental exhaustion this disease has on is is frustrating sometimes. Just keep reiterating all the small AA and other sober quotes.
Even just telling myself that I've had this disease for 20 years and over half of my lifetime so each day is a huge mountain that I have to climb everyday and even if no one notices I know I DID IT!
Congratulations on your time sober. I just earned my 45 day badge yesterday. I like that loosid has these badges because they act as incentive to stay on the sober path.
I do the same thing.
One of the hardest things for me is to forgive myself. For the stupid choices that I've made in the past and the poor decisions. I have 45 days today sober but it's been many many years of not being sober or having periods of sobriety 6 months 9 months but always going back. And it's taking me many years to figure this out but I'm My own worst enemy I've had many arguments with myself. Why did I do this why did I do that. This might sound really easy but it's one of the hardest things to do and that's not reacting to a situation because if you don't react it's never going to be a problem. I got this little guy that sits on my shoulder and whispers in my ear don't say it don't even think about it because you know how it's going to turn out. Even if it's just just for a second that's enough time to stop that thought from coming out of your mouth and she know is going to get you in trouble. It's like watching a movie you know the ending but you still expect to turn out different you've tried watching them long version the short version the revised version and it all turns out the same. So just giving myself even a second to remind myself to shut up be quiet this is not the time to say it even though it might make me feel good temporarily. But it's still not worth it it's a selfish act that is run on fear and anxiety. So this is something I work on constantly I don't want to be a dry drunk anybody can quit drinking but it's what kind of person you are when you're not drinking. I want to be that kind person that has empathy for people and situations in my everyday life I want to be humble and not being a rush to be heard or seen. But just be happy not being the loudest one in the room listening instead of talking. Those are the biggest struggles I have today. So I keep that foremost and everything I do it's getting a little better every day.
I agree with what was said by everyone. I'm almost to my 7th month sober. One of the hardest things for me is that I feel like sobriety is a truth serum. I feel like I have to tell everything that I may have been lying about or had done wrong or had been ashamed of whilst I was drinking; in order to correct the past. What I have found is while it may make me feel better, some of it has actually been harmful to people to hear it. So I too have to learn to keep my mouth shut. I have to remind myself that I am reliving the past but I don't need to make the people around me relive it because they're already having a hard time getting over what was done. It's about emotional sobriety. It's about how you're going to change your life to be a better person. It's so that you stop hurting those around you and yourself. In the beginning AA helped me become sober and reconnect me to spirituality. But I don't feel it's necessary to continue to go in order to heal. I think there comes a time for everyone where you have to learn to stand on your own two feet again and know that you can make decisions without having to have a group conscience. Free will. So now it's about being mentally tough and spiritually sound and standing on my morals. There are going to be days where you have conversations with yourself. That's completely normal. But if it continues, I suggest seeing a mental health professional because a lot of us need that additional assistance and it's okay. Best of luck!
Thank you for sharing. I enjoyed reading a bit about you. I’ve got 45 days sober as of today. Thank god for hope. I lost that for a while.
Hang in there, it gets really good!
I do it all the time!
I know those mental arguments too well. Talking it out with someone in the program helped me break that loop. You’re not the only one going through that.
You know sometimes hope is all we have. And it always carries us through if you let it.
I’m new here and just getting ready to try and quit again.I recently went 30 days no alcohol and before that 60 days and a 70 days alcohol free.It’s hard to stay away from it cuz for me it’s partly boredom and I work in the restaurant industry where everyone seems to drink a lot and they seem to handle it mentally so why can’t I?
🫤
lol it’s crazy and I’m guilty as charged. I have been trying to practice mindfulness and it has helped me. I just tell myself stop! breathing in and breathe out. Helps me get back to reality and back grounded in the moment
This is m t first time taking recovery 100% serious too -- it's not a matter of days you've been sober but more of a lifelong commitment to staying clean...when you ask yourself how long you will be sober for, remember if you're doing it right it's going to last your whole life.
Isn’t this a form of dissociation?
Or a way to try and still hold on to some control very hard for me to let go I’m not trying to be sarcastic, but at least in your head can win the fight the way you want to I still have those moments
I used to do that all the time..as I've gotten more sober and older I realize that that just isnt anything but negativity to my self..I've now started posting positive stuff, talking more positive to myself and tell myself there's no energy in fighting with myself or people...I've stopped trying to control everything and relaxed..