I broke up with my fiance because I couldn't accept her drinking problem. Loving someone and having to say goodbye because I deserve better is the hardest thing I have done in my life and in my sobriety.
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Woah. Before my wife and I broke up her drinking was an issue too. Not getting drunk around me but a constant presence of alcohol. I know what you mean.
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Your sobriety has to come first. Been there done that. Stay strong.
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That takes a lot of strength. Sounds like you grew apart. You, excelling in your sobriety, and her remaining in the shackles of intoxication. Has she made any indication that she would like to quit as well?
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She told me I wasn't worth not drinking for. So that was the end of that. I do feel bad making that choice while she was intoxicated.
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I just want to feel ok.
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So you guys have had this conversation before when she was sober and it was still the same?
I have had this talk so many times with her but nothing changes. This was the first time I got this answer though.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. I know how hard it is…
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You say nothing happens when you have this talk with her. So at any point did she ever agree that she has a drinking problem and should probably stop?
A few times she acknowledged it. Did a workbook and saw a counselor a few times a few years ago but no more work on it. I was the one "projecting my problem on her"
How out of control does she get with her drinking? Does she ever drink and drive? Does she act belligerent? Or is she a responsible drunk? If you don't mind my asking.
5-7 bottles of vodka a week, drinks and drives if no one stops her and all of the wonderful behavior that comes with being black out drunk 4 nights a week minimum.
Enough that the guy (me) who use to use IV drugs for a lot of years and the life that goes with that says holy s$#t lady you need help.
Makes it to work 95% of the time. Lots of new mattresses and couches. Doors left open in the winter, dogs running the neighborhood, broken towel bars, toilets, beds, dishes, tables, lamps, bruises all over her body, but yeah she makes it to work and she usually takes pretty good care of her kids as long as I cook and buy groceries...
Sounds like she is in the grips of alcoholism big time. At this point, choice is not an option. She may want to quit but she has no say. The disease has taken over. She needs to dry out. And she also needs enough reasons to stay dry afterwards. If loved ones aren't enough of a reason to get sober, personal freedom might be the only thing that could save her. Has she ever been arrested or did time? Also do you have any support such as family members that agree that she needs help?
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Wow. She needs to get into a detox facility as soon as possible. At this point there is no way she can do this on her own without medical supervision. I was like that with my drinking but I never drove and actually my last relapse at the beginning of the pandemic was totally sneaking and hiding the cr@p in my closet. I really was so sick and I knew I wanted to stop. Shaking, vomiting, couldn’t eat and I to broke things and very angry. I would be sitting on my deck with my husband and run back and forth drinking small bottles of wine, brushing my teeth and back outside like I did nothing wrong. I would pray for god to take me because I watched my brother die the color of a lemon from his drinking. I would get up every morning to see if my eyes were yellow. Thank god one night I forgot to rebrush my teeth and hubby smelled the wine. Thank god. I ended up in the best detox hospital and thank god I have 34 months. She needs to see the harsh reality of what she is doing to herself. I have a 40 year old friend waiting for a liver transplant. I really pray that something can be done for her. I pray that you continue to stay strong. Sorry I said so much but alcoholics are so so dependent on that cr@p and it took over my life. Ruined relationships are still trying to be mended. I wish that love ones could force people into rehab. Unfortunately not allowed, unless she is force by doctor or law enforcement. I will be praying for you. Show her some Utube videos the reality of what that sh&t does to our bodies. Sorry long post. I just feel so strongly about sobriety now and try to help as many as possible. Good luck my friend. 
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Bradley, I don't know if you are familiar with Al Anon or the writing of Melody Beattie. Being in a relationship with an alcoholic can really affect you. It changes us. Please look into some resources to help you learn to heal from this. I can give you recommendations if you are interested. Be kind to yourself.
You did the right thing for YOU and that’s what matters 
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Hey man you just gotta remember that, that wasn’t what God wanted for you, everything happens for a reason and this just means God gots an even better girl planed for you