After almost 2 years of sobriety, I find myself asking, " What's the point?"
I can't drink or smoke or do anything that requires self-control.
Most of my life-long friends are long gone...and they should be!
I blew up my marriage and can't seem to handle dating at all.
It's weird, after yhe buzz of sobriety wears off the weight of reality crashes down.
I'm not going to go back to drinking but some days I fail to see any reason why I am here and what my purpose may have been.
Whatever is was, I don't think I achieved it.
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I hit the wall pretty hard at 3 years. I decided at that time add another 12 step program. ACA. For me a little different dialogue really helped. Itâs all recovery. It helped keep my AA recovering fresh too.
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In my experience in sobriety, everybody falls off the pink cloud at some point, usually many times over. You said it, reality smacks you in the face, and you're just left with yourself, and sometimes that's not great. Like any other kind of rough patch in life, we just have to find a way to push through it. Listen, if there's one downside of sobriety, it's the loneliness, it's a lonely cause sometimes, even if you have a partner you can still feel alone in this alcohol filled world. The best way I know of to get through these depressing times is to switch the focus on someone i can help and get out of myself. That is the core of recovery. This is a way that you can get that buzz back. Good luck.
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I understand your struggle. If I had an easy answer I'd definitely give it. Time does help. You'll learn new things and ways and more about yourself as that time passes. Sometimes I hit a wall out of nowhere and feel the same way. If I'm miserable being sober what's the point etc. Then it passes and I'm back to what is " normal " for me.
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Steven, the only point of living is LOVE! I could only truly love once I was sober.
Yeah I was pissed off I could not do all the things I thought I loved such as drinking, drugging, womanizing and beatin fools down. But then I came to learn about unconditional love thatâs not fleeting! Then I realized that I can get high again, but in a super healthy way.
Iâm here if you ever want to talk
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Sorry youâre feeling that way. I would definitely get to a meeting and talk to your sponsor.
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Dang Iâm about to hit 2 years hope I donât feel the way you do 
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Itâs all relative in my opinion. All any of us have is today.
ODAAT
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This feeling will pass
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Donât get stuck in this feeling! It sounds like youâre focusing on what drinking did 'for you' instead of what it did to you. You may not be thrilled with where your life is after two years sober, but if youâre truly an alcoholic, I can guarantee the last two years would have been a lot worse if youâd been drinking. Staying sober will alway serve you better because going back out will make even two days feel impossible to string together. Do you have a sponsor you can reach out to or a local network where you can hit a meeting? Either way, weâre here for you!
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This is so relatable and please know that your pain is valid. When I get down and out and feel like saying âmeh, eff itâ, I remind myself what a disaster my life situation would be if I added booze. Our worst day sober really is better than our best day drunk. Sitting with big emotions and allowing myself to truly feel the intensity of them was one of my biggest challenges in early sobrietyâweâre so accustomed to drowning themâŠbut Iâm guessing you know as well as I do that no problem was ever solved by getting wasted, it only made the long-term emotional pain 100 times worse. Loneliness can be a hard, hard thing to sit with but we learn how by doing the dang thing. Make friends with yourself, take yourself out to dinner or a movie, try something youâve always wanted to but didnât âhave the timeâ before. If you donât already journal, I canât recommend it enough. The whole journaling thing gets thrown around so much that I feel like it can almost sound clichĂ©, but I promise you that putting pen to paper â without any regard to what someone else would think of your words â is one of the most therapeutic things there is. Donât think, just start writing. You took a big step just by posting this, and that in itself is something to be really proud of! For real.
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I agree Mychal⊠youâve forgotten how miserable alcohol was âŠ. There is no âself controlâ with alcohol ⊠the drug controls youâŠdonât agonize what âmay have beenâ âŠ. Create the life you want ⊠sobriety gives you that chance
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Well said Krista⊠worst day sober is better than the best day drunk
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Sounds to me like you have completely missed the point of, or not worked, the 12th step. THAT my friend, if nothing else, IS THE POINT.
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Today I'm in year 37. Did 40 months of treatment in my 20s. HAD ALOT of work Todo and still working on things. Be a LONG TERM THINKER. Sometimes it takes years and decades to REBUILD. ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE IF YOU DON'T QUIT. DEVELOP A PURPOSE AND VISION FOR YOUR LIFE. YOU CAN DO THIS
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I appreciate all of yhe responses. I will heed yhe advice. Thanks a bunch!
My life would be way worse if I was drinking. I've proven that! Now I feel like I've wasted everyone's time by existing! I'm never going to hurt myself. Never. That's not the plan. But I have to wonder what my life could have been. It sucks to be playing out the string.
I'm pushing through it, and I'll survive. I was hoping for more than survival.
Well put.
Whenever I hit one of these walls, I say to myself let go and let God itâs one day at a time this too will pass, and it gets better as I work the program. For me, I love to be sober, and my life is still on manageable but much more manageable than if I was drinking. My thoughts for today.
Just for today I will attend a meeting be of service and connect with my HP all before 10 am lol then Iâm a warrior throughout my day
Fighting my diseased thinking
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They told me âif donât like what you are getting then do something differentâ.