I was doing so well and I fell. hard. i feel alone. i feel vulnerable. i feel like everyone else gets to have a few drinks and they are happy, when i do it, it leads to chaos. i’m struggling and need community but none of my friends understand. i need help. i am not like them. where I can enjoy and be fine. i struggle so bad and when i start i CANT stop.
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The cycle of getting sober, feeling better, and then falling back into the same rut over and over again, is something most of us can relate to. Quitting is the easy part, it’s the staying quit that is so hard. The only thing that is helping me stay quit is my daily program of recovery. I suggest you get involved with a recovery program. AA and NA 12 step programs are the most common, but today there are many other options. Some that I’ve heard of are SMART Recovery, Dharma Recovery, The Luckiest Club, Women in Recovery, The Phoenix, and there’s more.
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Go to a dāmn AA meeting and make some sober connections. Of course your regular friends aren't gonna understand.
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thank you so much! appreciate all the advice!! 
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you’re such a nice person, thanks
I'm trying to save your life, not stroke your ego.
Go to some women's AA meetings and meet some ladies who know what you're going through. That's the point of AA. Struggling people helping struggling people.
That was all I was trying to say.
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i appreciate the honesty! sometimes it’s hard to give and receive so thank you!
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First off you should be proud of yourself.you are facing your demons and trying to improve yourself.so what if you can't drink like someone else.can they open up and be honest about true feelings and a desire to change?i don't think you are giving yourself enough credit.so you fell down..but look at how you are dealing with it.you got back up, asked for input from others that are going through something similar. what you might see as a weakness i see as strength. you are doing great!! Keep moving forward.you got all the support from your friends here.you will never be alone
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goodness, this was so kind! thank you so much! i really needed that!!
U should def check out a in person meeting, seriously u will finally find ppl like u! And others who just can’t go out n have that drink u kno? It’s gonna be okay love I promise, keep fighting! Ur doing great! 🩷
You're not alone. You will never be alone again. Dive in to your AA program. You are me and I am you 
keep going You're going to be fine.
Truth is the alcohol isn't what's making anyone happy anyway, it's the persons and activities that are. Simply put alcohol is a poison that is marketed to us by companies who want to sell it to us, so they lie about what it does. You're not alone, thanks for sharing your journey with us.
We aren't like normal people. There are great suggestions in this thread. Reaching out just now is a big step, but in order to stay stopped, you need to take action. There is a solution. For me, AA works- and I work at my recovery every single day. It's our thinking that's the problem, the alcohol is just a symptom. Good luck and please keep reaching out.
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If your friends can't sober hang with you, they aren't your friends and they might have problems of their own.
I was so concerned that I'd become distant from my close friends due to not drinking, but the ones who matter made it a point to sober hang out with me because they saw how bad things had gotten and wanted me to get better. They were invested in my sobriety as well.
Slowly, and when I had some time, they began inviting me to events where there would be booze around but with no expectations. Some would even forego larger events to sober hang with me so I wouldn't feel left out.
This, in addition to connecting with others in recovery is what got me through.
I know how fortunate I am, and I am eternally greatful, but maybe use what I've described above as a template for whether or not someone is a true friend or, rather, an auxilary acquaintance that you used to get along with well enough while you were drinking. There's a difference.
Some great suggestions in this thread. Also, seek out groups that are active (gym, yoga classes, cycling classes, jogging or hiking groups on Meetup or local facebook groups). More people than you think keep alcohol to a minimum in their lives because it really detracts from a healthy lifestyle.
Wishing you stength and that you find a place and people amongst whom you can be your true self.
Don't beat yourself. Staying quit is the hardest. Keep trying. Feed yourself by reading about the benefits of staying sober, investigate ways to stay sober, some ideas will appeal to you. Google questions you may have on Sobriety. Stay motivated..
But everyone else doesn't get to have the amazing experience we get to have.
It's OK to feel uncomfortable and discontent at times. The key to hope is allowing yourself feel the discomfort, recognizing it and logically process through it so you can detach from it. They are almost gifts for self actualization if you let them
I felt that way as well, for a very long time. I then realized that it is okay to have my flaws and it is okay to me me. I sat with those emotions and accepted them, which in turn released them. I believe in you and the strength you have to be okay with you.
I will be honest, it sucks to be an Alcoholic!! The more you work on sobriety, the easier the “suck of being an Alcoholic is”.. Just get back that horse that fell off of and work on it one day at a time! God Bless you can do it!
I can go to a bar with my sisters and designate drive, dance and have a great time, because they know me, love me and accept me for who and what I am. I can not go out to a bar with friends because they pressure you to drink and say things like "One drink won't kill ya". In fact one drink will kill the me I have become, honest, loyal, giving, caring...and much more. The sober me has a better life then the drunken lying, fighting, manipulation mean monster I was. It's a hard choice but for some reason, I finally like the me I've become. Don't beat yourself up. Dust yourself off, get to a meeting, reach out! God speed.
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Make an AA zoom meeting ok??
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