I have a little bit more than 4 months of

Struggling Help
#1

I have a little bit more than 4 months of sobriety. I don’t go to meetings often, I don’t have a sponsor , I have done my steps with my previous sponsor in different state, but after moving to TX I can’t find a sponsor.
I feel more or less okay. I have kids, have hobbies, part time job, relationship.

But last days abs especially this evening I feel such terrible cravings.
I know for sure that if I start , I won’t stop and eventually I will be in trouble as it happens before each time I relapsed.
I am feeling so scared. I want to drink so bad, I took my Xanax to help me calm down. I took warm bath.
I am not going to drink tonight .
But I really don’t like that after 4,5 months my mind still tries to trick me.

How I can fix that?
Or I just need patience and wait when it will go away?
God, it’s hard.
I pray a lot. But my mind still trying to tell me bad things.

4032×3024 1000 KB

19 Likes
#2

Maybe get to a meeting and cathart with others who are struggling too?

1 Like
#3

That whole mind trying to trick you can happen at any point. I had over a year and there were still times my head would mess with me. I also suggest a meeting and having a community. I see this for myself as a life long process. Always working on my sobriety. Glad you reached out and hopefully a good night's rest will help.

2 Likes
#4

Nothing changes if nothing changes … go to more meetings and get more involved with your sobriety

1 Like
#5

I tried to go meetings but I can’t feel it helps to be honest. People or with a long term sobriety who just give me advice don’t work for me, or people who just became sober which is also not helpful.

#6

Thanks Steve. Yes I definitely need to go more often. I just don’t really like the nearest group to my place. I really do like one place but it’s 35 mins driving

1 Like
#7

Looks Iike meetings is the only one solution to get rid of my crazy part of mind?

2 Likes
#8

There are other options besides AA meetings. Have you tried any online?

#9

Jane,
I think you know what the solution is. Just like your exercises, if we don’t put in the work, we cannot expect results.
In the A.A. program we do put the “crazy” part of our minds to rest. By working the steps.
It’s great that you recognize the disease. The insanity of thinking this time will be different. It’s good that you are reaching out.
The tools are there, you just have to pic them up.

1 Like
#10

I still get cravings from time to time, some worse than others, so I don’t think it’ll go away but you’ll learn techniques to help calm your cravings quicker and be able to recognize and stop them before they overrun your mind.

I enjoy meetings, I’ve learned a lot of good things. One of my favorite to help calm my mind is I don’t have to be sober for 20 years, I just have to be sober today. And tomorrow wake up with a fresh mind. It’s a daily battle. I also talk to god a lot throughout my day, and know that he’s in my corner prepping me for the next round. And reading, um I guess, spiritual books helps me understand him better and view the world more differently.

#11

One in reading now is “how god makes men” by Patrick Morley. It depicts the stories of all the main people in the Bible. And one chapter about Job is on the principal of suffering for no reason. We don’t get put through times of suffering to be punished or tested, but rather to learn and grow. This led me to start thinking in terms of what I can I learn from this and how can I grow rather than why is this happening or why me. And it helped me to focus on more of the positives over the negatives and reduce my cravings a bit.

1 Like
#12

You gotta find a different meetings then. Noody should be giving you advice. Maybe find a women's meeting?

#13

Jane, I had to do the steps multiple times. It’s like pealing an onion. I had to go deeper and deeper. The more I did then I got stronger and more free!
I successfully sponsor multiple sponsees over the phone.
Let me know

2 Likes
#14

Meetings are like free therapy for me. Get a sponsor as soon as you are able to. It helps to lean on them.

#15

Well I got six years sober and I can tell ya this I had cravings up to a year ago Less and less often what I do is play the tape of what it’s was like and the trouble it caused it helps , also when I had cravings I hit a meeting rt away

1 Like
#16

I did. But you know I would prefer in person. Especially to find a sponsor

1 Like
#17

Matt, thank you. Recovery tools. I am trying to use them!

1 Like
#18

You are right. But sometimes I even can’t live one day with calm mind. That’s sucks

#19

It always helps?

#20

Danny I like comparing with peeling an onion.