I lapsed and i cant handle the guilt and everything that comes with it.. I was 13 days clean from my DOC. Im now on my 2nd day of choosing to stay clean but i do feel like a broken record , disappointment to my loved ones that are supporting me.
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One day at a time. You can do it.
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Relapse is part of recovery. Learn from it change something, ask for help - you’ve got this… like Sarah says one day at a time.
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What is your DOC? if you dont mind sharing
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Thanks for the replies
Fern, you’re not alone! I was a chronic relapser for way too long! The great news is that you never have to feel like this again! Remember this miserable feeling the next time you want to get high.
I finally got sick of the broken record as you say and got serious about my sobriety.
There are real solutions that work if you’re serious. They’re easier than what you’ve been doin😵💫
I’m here if you want to talk
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Try not to hold it as guilt. Think of it as something you can learn from so you don’t repeat the same mistake. What matters most is that you made it back, and that counts for everything.
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It will stick! Just keep trying. You know how many of us kept relapsing over and over. It will stick!
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Thanks for sharing Fern. We need sober support more than anything. We don't care more than your family, but we understand each other in a way most other people can't. Sober support is essential to our recovery 
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I have absolutely been right where you are, by the grace of God, I was able to get back up. I have been on drugs actively for over 30 years, on Sunday I made 365 day clean and sober. Cry out to your higher power, if he can do it for me, and I thought I would die in active addiction, He can and will, do it for you, you got this!!!
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Don't beat yourself up. Look at the positive side. You made it 13 days and recognize that you messed up. There was a time when 24 hours was impossible for me. Almost 9 years since my first meeting ... 98% clean the entire time. Slips and bumps along the way. For the last 43 months... I am 100%. Keep making 24 hours at a time.
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Let the guilt go. It’s too heavy. Part of recovery is falling but getting back up. You can do this. Just one day at a time.
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You are not alone. Don’t look at it like staring over. Look at it as the beginning of something new. Even though change is hard and new is scary, being sober is worth all the confusion at first. I’m only maybe 59 days sober and it’s been the greatest 50 days of my life
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Thank you Danny
Fern, I feel you on a deep level. 13 days is something to praise! Not the relapse. Give power to the 2 weeks that you were clean; and know that you can do that again. . .maybe longer next time.
Keep up the fight💪🏽
Drug Of Choice
Drug of choice
This time change what you did wrong the first time.
Stop trying to please people who support you. You can’t be clean for others.
Go to meetings everyday, join a group, get active in your program. Find a sponsor work your program. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. These programs only work if you work them. So starting today do the work. Get to a meeting today.
No one is perfect...if this was easy it wouldn't be a problem...give yourself credit for the days you were clean and at least you are able to see you need recovery ...some people NEVER see it ....You're not alone....keep reaching out ...there's people w all kinds of good advice on here...take it and learn from it...it is a blessing...let your higher power lighten your load...it's all up from here baby...you are in the right place at the right time!
Always remember to love yourself and forgive yourself and be kind to yourself.
You can do this.
Message me anytime