I’ve been sabotaging myself for way too long. I used alcohol as a coping mechanism and all it did was push everyone I love away. I’m so glad I came across this app, I didn’t know there was a sober community. I need to learn to sit in my feels and heal properly but I feel so lost. Has anyone else felt so depressed in the beginning?
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I was an emotional wreck the first month or so. I relapsed after 4 years sober and hid it for a couple months until my wife caught me. I thought I was going to lose everything I worked so hard for, my family, trust, my baby girl...well I didn't. I did and still have to work on the trust thing but everything else is even better than before because I appreciate it all so much more now. Keep grinding at it, it does get better. Not easier but better. Once you really start to work on yourself you perspective on things change as well. The best change I've seen is becoming less selfish and realizing it's so much easier to help others and care for others and consider others than to whine about my difficulties etc. hope this helps.
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Totally. From when I was like 13 until I got sober the first time at 29 I never felt like I fit in anywhere and I perfected burning bridges with people to avoid feeling abandoned.
When I was in treatment I learned about cycles. Relationship, friendship, addiction, etc all have cycles. Once I acknowledged that it helped open my eyes. My family life growing up was terrible and I wAs such an angry, rejected, invisible, outcast and always felt like an alien. My dad abandoned me when I was 4 due to his alcoholism which negatively impacted my entire childhood.
Anyway, yes. It feels depressing at first. But dude, facing your triggers and overcoming them and resolving whatever makes you feel lost will only come from you actually digging in and looking at yourself honestly.
Good luck. You are totally not alone.
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Thanks that helps. I’m working on one day at a time at the moment. Very thankful for this community 
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Also one of the biggest helps for me was actually meeting people in person in recovery. Like from meetings, getting people of the same sexx's phone numbers and building a network of sober like minded individuals. Not sure if you are into fitness but CrossFit is great for peeps in recovery as well. The community is amazing and everyone that does it is very goal driven and determined people. You kinda have to be to force yourself through some of those workouts lol. But when you are the one behind in one and everyone is cheering you on to finish, it is awesome.
I cried on the table of AA every day for three weeks straight. The unfortunate part of putting down are substance is that we still have all the emotional baggage that we drank away, now we feel them.
. That’s where a program of recovery comes in, we learn how to deal with life on life’s terms. My depression and anxiety have greatly decreased to a manageable level through the step work of AA and Adult children of alcoholics ACA. I pray the best for you, you are worth sobriety
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Nope. Never. Have always been a happy go lucky never depressed addict.
P.S. I got a great deal on the Brooklyn bridge if you’re interested. Running a special this month.
Wow! I could relate to your story in so many ways. Ditching alcohol is the first step into my self healing. I know I have a lot of work to do. Thank you so much for sharing your story!!!
That’s great advice, I’m looking into fitness as a way healthier way to cope with the stresses of life. I’m going to look into meetings as well.
Thank you, for sharing! I’m definitely going to find a meeting in my local area for support
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When I was really depressed at first I read a lot of books that gave me comfort and normalized how I was feeling. Try, the unexpected joy of being sober and love warrior. Annie grace is a favorite too. Good luck girl we’re here for you!
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Thanks so much, I’m looking it up on amazon now!!
Yeah the beginning was very tough. I used had a dating merry go round the first few years after I became sober.
I have 7.5 years sober now and my daughter is 2. Although my relationship is open, I mostly stay busy with work and my daughter.
It is imperative that you don’t start thinking you can do this alone. Reach out. Voice things. You’re worth it.
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Thank you for your kind words! I did want to become a recluse for a little bit because all my friends drink. So I’m looking for meetings near me.
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I am excellent at isolating when I’m feeling super crummy and will take days to process my bad feelings and then I’ll reach out to people. But I’ve also done a lot of work and am still learning how I am and what I can handle. Boundaries are hard, dude. But being a recluse in the beginning will be stunting your growth and you’ll have feelings of being left out cause they’re out drinking and you’re not … but get to meetings and attempt to connect with other sober women. I promise you will start meeting people who breathe life into your sober life and all will work out.
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I’m feeling pretty much the same way. I try to talk to people, but I’m just feeling really blah/stuck regardless. I’m in the beginning of my journey as well. Glad to have found a community of people who understands.
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Absolutely. I struggled with depression and feeling generally lost early on in recovery and sometimes still, but...
It gets better. I hated to hear that when I first started my journey but those old dudes at the AA meeting I attended were right. It really does get better.
Start building that support network, go check out some meetings, and most importantly, don't drink no matter what.
You can do this. We all can do this. Glad you are here.
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That’s really great advice. I found a women’s meeting near where I live.
I’m going to take advantage of some local meetings, i definitely need some support in people near me. I’m glad to hear it gets better.