I’m in a similar situation as you. I chose to go with AA and within a month, I see a noticeable change in my way of thinking. After my 4th/5th steps, I’ve been able to take a deeper look into my personality defects, my resentments and the role I played in all of it. YOU have to be responsible for your own happiness and you must start taking action. The app is awesome bc there’s so much support! I wish you the best of luck, you’re stronger than you think!
Have you been to an AA meeting.
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Loneliness derives from getting lost in your own thoughts and then not being able to find your way home.
I'd start with home, whatever that may be to you. I, too, pushed away and isolated everyone who cared about me. Although this app is wondrous, I needed the support from those who knew me personally; my struggles. No expectations as the ones who dont expect anything are the ones worth fighting for...
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I know exactly what you are going through. I pushed the love of my life away from me and into someone else’s arms, because of my issues my problems my insecurities and my fear of changing. This happened on September 31st, my wife decided to find the comfort, affection and support in someone else, I can’t and don’t blame her. It’s taken 99 days of working this program and working the first 7 steps to really wanting to make these changes for me even though it’s to late to save my marriage. There’s still pain there but it’s a different feeling. If you trust the process and work the steps you will and can find happiness. You have a lot of people here that won’t judge and will just listen if that’s all you need. Stay strong you can do this.
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The beginning can be a great beast. Hang in there. Melissa had it right. The old version of yourself has given up the ghost and the new version hasn't established itself yet. It can feel weird and unnatural to not fall into old compulsions. Stay strong. You can do this.
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Yes depressed and emotional
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That’s a great way of looking at it. I think yes, sometimes we get stuck in our own minds and cause our own chaos. My kids are my home because no matter where they are they are my heart. I’m fighting for myself so I can be a better mother.
I completely understand and feel your pain, I’m still grieving the loss of my marriage. I’m going to start meetings and learn to work the steps as well. Thank you for sharing
Yes. I’m still living in the past. I know I will survive and make it through. It’s a scary thought to be honest to give up the one thing that I ran to when things got hard. I know it’s not the best solution and isn’t serving me any purpose anymore. Thank you for the encouraging words
I have meetings on Sunday and Monday locally to me. 
I am 580 days in and depressed as ever but it beats numbing with alcohol. My life is not good mentally or emotionally. I am lost but today I will not pick up or use.
Do you have a sponsor? Get to more meetings if you can. At the very least there are some good ones a zoom.
In my opinion sobriety is like life. We have our ups and downs. Streaks, peeks, and valleys. But learning to navigate throughout life with booze is definitely the way to go!!
I can definitely relate. I'm actually looking to see if there's someone who would talk to me privately some. I'm in a rough spot and I would really like to vent and get feedback without judgement. Thanks in advance!
Stay Strong Liz! We can g et through this!
I can take you fishing. A 90lb tuna on the line will cure depression immediately Liz!
I have felt depressed and I have almost five years. But I know now what to do and I am a child of chaos so it’s difficult to be still sometimes. I know now not to believe what my mind is saying. I get depressed when I am unhappy with what my higher power wants for me, in short I’m upset my life isn’t going how I planned. I say this prayer and it always help “Higher Power please help me remove whatever is blocking m from your spirit!” Good luck, try not to sit in it, go to more meetings and call people in recovery and ask them how they are doing and just listen 
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Thank you for that. Life is a struggle, I hope I can get to where I have more good days than bad.
I feel that so much, I’m struggling as well. We have to keep going and pushing on! You got this!
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Thank you for all useful information 
That’s my plan at the moment, to go without alcohol because I’m so toxic when I drink.