I have a partner who still uses and has become the worse bf/bd. I let him visit his son an he brought drugs, almost as if wanting to trigger me to use. We got into a huge fight and I kicked him out an he hit me. I’m not gonna lie I almost ended up using from the stress and the hurt he has caused me but then I thought about how far I’ve come. I officially cut him off an it’s day 1 of not talking to him and all I can think about is him. Why? Would he want to ruin my sobriety knowing how far I’ve come? Knowing my son had nobody to care for him but me? So much confusion and hurt. Praying for strength cuz I don’t want him back or to relapse.
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You are Codependent. I know, because I fight this too. I'm attracted to toxic people.
Get the fück out and stay that way.
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Yes, I’ve been told that I’m codependent. I’ve promised myself this last encounter was my last. I’m 100% committed to not going back. Thank you. Wish you well on your journey!!
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We gotta take care of ourselves first. And if our love and kindness aren't being reciprocated, we gotta get out.
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…is he going to come back?
You wrote that he hit you?!
There are numbers to call.
I am concerned for your safety and that of your son.
I am really sorry that you are going through this.
I have never been hit but have been in situations where I thought that the person was about to hit me.
( Which is why I got the eff outta that mess ).
What are you going to do in regards to keeping him away?
I hope that you never have to be anywhere near him.
How are you doing right now?
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No he isn’t coming back. I have made a TRO against him. I’m doing okay just tryna remain positive for my son.
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It’s hard but hang in there!
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Thank you.
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Relieved to read about the TRO.
Please keep us posted,
Kalola.
I am going to be checking in-to see how you are doing.
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Yes, thank you, thank you.
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…also, hope that you are proud of yourself for not using!
Wish that you were not having to deal with this stress…take everything second by second.
Take deep breaths.
I’m about to take some for you!
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it’s crazy how much of a trigger seeing someone you love say, here it’s okay let’s do it together?? My heart was beating so fast and I almost relapsed but then I said no ways ! How dare you ruin this for me! Actually I am pretty proud of myself for saying NO! then I got hit 
but it brought me clarity that I won’t let up easy of this sobriety journey.
Crazy how someone you had a kid with is so fast to make you fall off tracks because they are on that path. Sad sad sad! Definitely a wake up call.
…you should be beyond proud of yourself, Kalola!
When I hear about a man hitting a woman…I feel, well.
Rage.
I cannot imagine hitting someone.
No one should be hitting anybody.
I meannn.
Stating the obvious!
Do you have a support system nearby?
Do you go to meetings, etc.?
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You are strong and brave. It took strength to kick him out. It took strength to not use. It takes strength to go no contact. You’re doing the right thing.
I understand what it means to save yourself from an abusive relationship and stay sober at the same time, please don’t hesitate to message. You aren’t alone.
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I do have an awesome support system! My family stepped in big time considering my sobriety. I am currently attending meetings.
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Yes, it’s so hard to have no contact with all the questions I have a why’s ? But I’m in my acceptance era a learning to let go of what I can’t understand. Physical, mentally, emotional abuse is so hard to overcome especially along side trying to be sober. Thank you I’ll reach out. Sent you a friend request.
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Praying for you:pray:t3:
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Good for you Kalola, keep going to meetings and if you can try 1 Alanon meeting a week, Alanon meetings work!
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Good morning Kalola,
That has to be hard on yourself and your son. Sounds like some boundaries have to be set. For your safety and your son safety as well.
I have you and your son in my prayers.
What is your son‘s name? If you don’t mind 
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