My alcoholism has blead into cocaine use and progressively getting worse. I can’t drink without wanting blow. Has anyone else experienced this?
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I have not experienced it bc I have not tried it but it was always a fear of mine! I’ve only ever drank and tried weed a few times. Have taken pain killers and benzos as prescribed but very cautious with them… So I don’t really have experience with this but the reason I’m sharing it is because I was so scared of becoming an “addict” like my older brother.. I had many chances to try coke, E, ghb, etc. I went through a period where I wanted to just try coke & E but I didn’t bc I was so scared to. Fast forward to present day, I have a drinking problem! Go figure 
My point is that I think some ppl can be addicted to multiple substances and not just one. I have a very strong feeling I would have become one of those bc when I like something, I liiiike it. Never liked weed tho so who knows.
It’s good you realize the problem and if you already wanted to work on your alcoholism, you can kill 2 birds with one stone if you stop drinking 
. I am similar with ciggs…only want them when I’m drinking.. Wishing you luck and strength!!
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Yep, and cross-addiction is very real. With me, it always progressed. It didn’t get better until I got sober.
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I’m drunk and high right now and I don’t think I can pull the train off the tracks
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Oh nooo 
Well if you feel you’re in danger of controlling yourself and what might happen to you, you can go to the hospital and they will help you! They can give you some meds to calm down and sleep it off and then you can reassess when you come to.
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Yep 
that’s why they say absolutely no mind altering drugs - even weed
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Thank you both. I’m not going to go to a hospital but it’s one of those deals where I know I’m f&$* up but I just can’t help myself
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Don't even think about using coke and ghb This are making everything nightmare !!! Keep going guys !!! I saw this nightmare 4 years mentally and financially..My suggest just stay away ...
Hi Steve we can talk if you have more questions
I get it! That is how I am with drinking that’s why I knew I had to just cut it out. No sense of control when I have it.
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Nooooo I don’t anymore. It was a curiosity I had when I was like 18 but I refrained!
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It is better to find something makes you feel like high in life not drugs please
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I know all of you are right. But the train is steam rolling now and there is no stopping it. Day 1 starts tomorrow. I’m honestly shocked I’m even still messaging on this app
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Also..I hope you know how much of the coke is laced with fentanyl now.. Something you would never know! 4 spring breakers just died in Florida bc of it and more and more ppl everyday.. My mom OD’d from it too. I hope you are aware of this and it doesn’t matter where/who you’re getting it from- you did not see with your own eyes.
That’s bc YOU WANT to be better! And you can get there! Just be careful in the meantime 
And if you are not well coming off the stuff go to the hospital or detox instead of using again if you can get the willpower up. Praying for you.
And, do not wake up tomorrow “embarrassed” you posted this and were talking to us bc it’s a safe space! We have all been there. Use whatever positive support you can right now. On that note though- I must sleep!
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I thought I could have two beers and now here I sit a half bag of cocaine later and wide awake at 2am on a work night
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I think the best thing you can do is laugh it off tonight and try and get some rest and just remember why you’re on this app and find an na meeting near you, maybe therapy, and try again. The impulsiveness is way too familiar. Recently had an incident where I drank a bottle of wine(therapist said two glass limit and I just filled the glasses to the top, def stretching what she meant) and impulsively took a bunch of my moms prescription xans. Now I’m on ~another~ sobriety app and am going to try out na irl. It’s possible for anyone to get better. I can’t say I’ve been addicted to coke before ahd have snorted half a bag on a night before work but I can say the first time I took acid on a school night and proceeded to go to school tripping bc “if I can stay up all night I can go to school!!” Ambitious but stupid. It was out of impulse and desire to feel high. You’re not alone but you’re just gonna have to clean up the mistakes you make tomorrow bc of the decision you made tonight. It is what it is, have fun while it lasts, try not to overdose or turn it into a binge. Good luck!
Sounds like me minus the coke or other substances. “Thought I could just have a couple glasses of wine” turns into 2 bottles or more..into the next day. Then feeling like complete garbage and hating myself. Dooooo not want that life anymore. I worked to hard for what I have and do not deserve it! I have literally started taking it one day at a time and focusing on my recovery and I am doing so much better.. You have to want it for yourself and be real with yourself on what level of treatment you need.
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Yes, and crack, heroin, methamphetamine.... then comes loss of self, family, friends, job, everything I thought I owned, institutions, jail, and in my end staring death in the eyes. Without help, it's virtually impossible to just quit. Just quitting wasn't the answer for me. I had to be humbled and ready to finally surrender. I had to face myself and be willing to look at some cold hard facts. One, I'm not special. I don't get to cheat death and think I can manipulate another way to run on self will. A friend had told me the only way that I was going to heal was surrendering my life over to God, not to rehab or man to fix us. Once crossed that line of thinking I can continue to hurt myself, others that I can keep doing without any consequences. For me I was neglecting to be honest with myself that is why I lie to everyone else. I had to face my past; the pains, the guilt, the harm I was causing others. Think about it, do you use because you feel good about yourself only to feel empty in the end. My ego was so self absorbed that I chose to be high than to spend time with my children, I chose to lie rather than honor myself and be truthful to others. As long as I avoided finding answers to the truth of why I am hurting myself and others then I will continue to keep trying everything to help me not feel at all. I remember so clearly telling people who are on there way to living a sober life only to tell people I'm high. How selfish was this of me not to consider how this may affect someone negatively. Yeah, I was a self centered person who's knows what I was doing and failing to heed the message sooner than later that I was heading down a path of destruction. In the end, it wasn't all the meetings, the rehabs, the outpatients and jails that got me sober. It was a willingness to find a inkling of courage to surrender enough to look within myself and ask for help and pray to a higher power for just enough strength to show me the way. I am sending you good energy that you will make the best choice to freedom. Travel well my friend.
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