I agree with you Josh the people who are real with no bs.
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I know it's just hard at times
think of just one thing you can do to make your quality of life better. Work on that, and see how it goes. Also, please donāt play the comparison game. Accept where you are, donāt be ashamed of it, and try to make a positive but realistic adjustment. Just my two cent. Peace, brother.
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Well I don't think highly of myself I don't have high self esteem. And I do compare myself because everyone in the rooms is married and has kids. Sounds like a pretty good life to me. I appreciate you sharing I just am at a point where I feel like I'm losing faith
Bro I talk to people in a group chat full of 15 guys. I talk on the phone to at least one of them every day. I make a meeting a day. I talk to my sponsor. I pray and meditate every morning and night. What more do you want from me? I am doing everything I possibly can but my life still sucks.
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Iām sorry Joe. Hang in there though this is going to pay off eventually.
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Drinking will cover them for a short while, but ultimately make them worse. Sobriety allows you to live life on lifeās terms and to confront and solve the problems that drive your drinking. Better to solve your problems rather than drink them away for a short time and die from alcoholism.
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Same situation. Relapsed after 8 months. I push myself hard and was frustrated at my lack of progress instead of being grateful for my sobriety. Now back in treatment and starting over again. The booze is a double edged sword. You feel good for a moment and then it comes back and cuts you. Be easy on yourself. This is a marathon not a race. Discipline will get you farther than motivation. Do whatās right even when you donāt want to. My 2 cents.
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Getting drunk isn't going to help you move out of your parents house, it most likely will keep you there. Drinking hinders motivation and the ability to plan out your life.
Also, being sober long term means accepting yourself as who you are. Accepting your life as it is, as boring as it may be. Once you have accepted that your real life exists separately from the artificial fleeting pleasures drinking gives you, you can begin to create a life you choose- with clarity and acceptance of who/what you are. Being sober means facing yourself, not running away from yourself. It can be hard facing yourself, believe me. Also, time is on your side. The longer you go, the easier it gets. Just keep yourself out of situations that remotely might tempt you to drink. Hope this helps, cheers!
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couldnāt have said it better myself!! thank you for these words. I tell myself this whenever iām feeling low and try to make a pros/ cons list and thereās always way more cons. Writing out the list reminds me what will happen if I use and itās right in front of my face no denying what is.
I'm glad my words have resonated with you! It makes me happy to know I have helped in any way. It's been a long journey for me, 7 years alcohol free, and I know the mind can make excuses in those first few years. But as the years go by, the temptation fades and the idea of using becomes something as ludicrous as drinking gasoline- unnatural, unsafe, insane. Simply something you don't do or have any desire to do. I like your list idea. I think it could also be good to write a pros and cons list for "Not Using" and see how many pros you get!
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I periodically feel this way and donāt think itās abnormal. I have so many great memories that involve inebriation and changing my entire life to accommodate clean time has definitely helped in most regards but hurt in that regard.
Things I do to get on a better headspace: cook, garden, write, visit a museum, go bowling, and outdoor time. Interests change for everyone but try identifying a few things like that to keep you sane.
I know itās not easy, but also try and imagine your life if you had continued using. Maybe you think your life sucks now but I guarantee it would be so much worse if you were having your nightly drinks.
Feel free to DM me if you wanna talk more because this is something Iāve really struggled with but think I have a grip on.
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Yes, it's normal. In AA, continually choosing to drink is referred to as the insidious Is cycle of insanity.
It's 10 miles Into the Woods and 10 miles back out.
I hope you're going to meetings. If you are, you should be looking around for a sponsor and getting into the 12 steps.
The sooner that you do the sooner that the Promises will start to come true in your life.
Check out my post,
Then vs Now.
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Have you updated your resume? Looked for a new job? Determine how mic you would need to move out of your parents home? Itās great that you are being of service and getting to daily meetings but what are you actually doing to change your situation? I ask because I was in the same place as you and realized although I was ādoingā a lot, there was a lot I wasnāt doing.
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Thanks I hope you're right
None of my problems have been solved since I have been sober
Thanks I appreciate that sorry that you relapsed
Job I have now I love and honestly if I move out I know I might go back to drinking but I do want to move out. I just need to make it happen
Getting drunk will keep me from feeling unhappy and miserable with my life situation. If I drink after work like I used to then I won't feel that way
At this point I feel I was better off using or drinking