Resentment

I know this is something you work through while going through the steps, but how did/do you guys deal with resentments before you get to that step? I’m still on step one but there’s been one specific thing eating at me lately. I still have a hard time sharing in group settings and it seems like such a silly, ungrateful thing to be upset about but I’m definitely upset nonetheless.

13 Likes

There’s an app called My Spiritual Toolkit that has spot-check inventories you can do. I highly recommend it

2 Likes

Have you talked with your sponsor about it? Maybe get some direction to deal with it now instead of letting it eat at you

1 Like

Ooh thank you I’ll check it out!

1 Like

Yeah she’s a bit busy these days so I may have to reach out to some other women in my home group but I definitely need to talk to someone about it

2 Likes

If your sponsor is too busy and you’re in dire need than I would look into another sponsor …. It’s ok to fire a sponsor and although not common you can have 2 sponsors. Either way I’d have a talk with your current sponsor and let them know that you need them especially this early in your recovery. :pray:

1 Like

Yeah I have to get over my fear of “confrontation” lol.

3 Likes

It’s a process and you will learn to have patience I promise if you stick to it :pray:

2 Likes

Getting sober just ain't about quitting drugs when your all in with it it's nothing but making changes to almost everything . It's like being a new person almost . .

4 Likes

Working on it

2 Likes

Talking and sharing is the best way to work through it! Feel free to talk to me if you need a listening ear!

1 Like

Thank you so much :sparkling_heart:

Good old reaentments! We all have resentments, you have to fully be honest to yourself while dealing with resentments. Try not to leave any out. Also daily inventory helps out. I have been journaling everyday for almost a year now. I find less resentments if I do self inventory and journaling and FREE! Amends and resentments were my 2 hardest things to do in recovery. 1-write down everyone you resent (even yourself) 2- write down what you resent in each and every one of them 3- then in that moment, write down how it makes you feel 4- remind yourself these resentments are possibly part of why you used 5-Remember, you can have everything they have and then some 6- Free yourself from resentment as it will control you. Finally 7- You ARE THE BETTER VERSION OF YOURSELF without all this resentment

3 Likes

Your are not alone. Remember your share will help someone else more than it will help you

2 Likes

Finding out my part in the resentment and forgiveness. The freedom is in the forgiveness

2 Likes

I would like to add I agree with Allen depending on the situation it may just be time to let go . That all depends and is case by case though . I'm learning how to deal with them myself . Better luck to you on that one

1 Like

For me going through the steps and working a thorough 4th step for me to realize the part I’ve played in my resentments. The way I dealt with it before I got to step 4 was I didn’t really deal with it. I stayed angry and it was a struggle everyday. My best suggestion is forgiveness. Forgive them and forgive yourself.

5 Likes

Plainly stating your needs is not confrontational. Doing it with compassion means caring for their feelings and meeting your needs.

1 Like

Eh I screamed and process the painful emotions, I let myself feel the hurt. I also came to believe in soul contracts and found my lesson and eventually thanked most of them. There have been obstacles later in recovery that I struggled to let go of the pain but I’m greatful bc I have learned to process and learned so much about our nervous system so even that god has used to allow me to learn.

3 Likes

Thank you everyone for your amazing advice!