I see so many people struggling with AA. It’s a shame because it really does offer a beautiful solution. It’s so frustrating to see so many sick people reject AA, but I get it. I did the same thing. I wish they’d re-write the book and get rid of both the religious influence as well as the sexist influence. It’s frickin 2022!
I go to AA and deal with my “God”issues, as well as what I view as way too many religious undertones. I actually feel like I’m in the majority on feeling this way. The program goes to great lengths to say it’s spiritual (which it is), however, much of the AA program was influenced by the Oxford Group which was based upon religion. Thus, the religious undertones are in direct conflict with the concept that it’s a spiritual program not religious.
Whatever! It’s very confusing! It’s taken me a lot of years to finally be able to work around all of this, and finally get it (come up with my own personal power greater than my ego and self will.
A few people mentioned secular AA meetings. I looked it up to find out the difference. I really like these 12 steps much better. I find it a lot less like someone is trying to shove God down my throat. Why isn’t this more poplar?
Because "god" has an amazing marketing team. Humans are as superstitious as they are full of isht. I remember at my last job, we had a Hindu fella that worked alongside me in the lab. He was a really nice guy and all the Christian dudes there would mess with him about how absurd his religion sounded, which all of its god's with 8 arms etc. I had to remind them that they all believed that one old man and his family gathered up all the animals in the world and loaded them onto a boat that they built etc etc.
How absurd.
I just can’t with AA… I’ve been reading “quit like a woman” and while her book has strong undertones of oppression, which I don’t feel. One point stood out to me on her views about AA… AA says we are powerless…. And I whole heartedly agree with her (the author) in believing that we are POWERFUL… choosing to become sober is so POWERFUL. That’s us finding who we are. Finding out voice. And nothing should diminish that.
I get what you are saying about powerlessness. It does sound pretty lame and pathetic like we have no choice in the matter. I’ve come to interpret this powerlessness in a way that works for me. I do believe that there our powers greater than me, such as Mother Nature. I also feel like there’s a power in me that knows right from wrong (my conscious). I also know there’s a power in me that overrides my conscious (my ego and my personal wants and desires). For me, my addiction lives in my ego and subconscious). I need to always be mindful of it, and mindful that my conscious should guide me. My conscious is my connection to a power greater than myself. You f I’m not in tune with it, my ego takes over, and I become powerless to to control my drinking. I don’t if that makes any sense, but it’s working for me. All that really matters is that we all find something that works for us!
One of my favorite recovery books! I used her text along with others in my masters thesis. I highly suggest The Urge by Dr Carl Erik Fisher. It’s a history of recovery in America and was eye opening too!
Thank you for sharing these Lee!! It’s helpful for people to know there’s an alternative narrative and that there are so many options.
I should note that most people that are struggling to stay sober are trying to stay by just not drinking, and not following one of the many programs that are available. So if AA ain’t your jam, please do yourself a favor and find one. There’s a lot more to sobriety/recovery than abstinence. It’s about personal growth to find peace and happiness
Very useful 
YES to getting plugged in SOMEWHERE!
It says we were powerless. Not are…
I find it funny how people always have to change stuff to fit their selfish needs! 
I tried to change the AA way as well. I called it GUS for about 14 months. Realized that it’s simple to just Say God. I say a few prayers, I took inventory of my self, shared it with another human, I got real honest about how my past and present behaviors are causing problems with others, made a list of those I had harmed, made amends to those who would let me, spot check my inventory throughout the day, daily reprieve, meditation, and help another Alcoholic who still suffers and wants to get and stay sober, seems very simple to me.
Clean house, help others, be of service. You can put God anywhere you like in this program. In your heart, outside, backyard, it doesn’t matter. Just be honest with you and others, stop being selfish and help others. Basic morals..
our code is love and tolerance of others.
Ok that’s my take on it! I Love all of you no matter what program you do! I’m here to give guidance if you want it!
Thank you God for another beautiful day!
You just don't quit do ya? Hahaha
oh by all means you can just quit. For this real alcoholic I needed more help. I needed a new way to live life.
Don't forget about gravity! Definitely a power greater than all of us combined.
I'm still not a fan of the powerless part. I'm the one that made all the decisions - to drink, to get sober. I'm the one not drinking every day. So I'm clearly not powerless to alcohol or otherwise, just needed a hand during the rough parts. Nobody took over and did it for me. I probably wouldn't be sober if they did. I wanted it, desired it, and chased after being sober.
And step 3 is a huge ask for me. Turning my life over is way more than I'm bargaining for at this stage. That's too much fellowship for me. I'm at the dipping my toes in stage regarding meetings.
That’s cool! Whatever you are doing is working for you. You have turned your life around, and you’re contributing to helping others. We are all in this together
Haha nah I was busting your baIIs on the god stuff haha.
All in fun though, please don't take it in hostility.
Also, it's pretty fücking lame that the word baIIs is censored on this site. The ridiculous over parenting of language here is dumb.
Kinda like these steps…
Thank you Lee! I really like these steps and am struggling with AA right now. Very grateful that you posted this. It inspires me to keep trying new meetings until I find my home group. I’ve become too isolated in this, and I’m making too many excuses to not find fellowship.
I go to AA alot, don't get me wrong it helps alot, it's not the be all for me. There's so many more programs where you can get out and meet people, be active. Again not knocking AA, as it has helped tremendously.