I'm now sober 3.5 months and long forgotten memories or horrible things I did when drunk are coming back. I did these things 10 years ago and I'm just now feeling bad about it. How do you all cope?
19 Likes
Ty, hang in there. The Big Book tells us “more will be revealed”.
2 Likes
I suggest reading page 62 of the Big Book.
2 Likes
Feel them, look at them with rationally, and let them go. I know… easier said than done. But if you do a 4/5 step and a 6/7 step it will get better, I promise.
4 Likes
Hang in there 
Shame and regret kept me out for years . Maybe keep that serenity prayer in your pocket and say it a couple times a day … be gentle with yourself
2 Likes
"more will be revealed" hahaha that sneaky sneaky god, always playing tricks and working in mysterious ways and such. So hand wavey.
1 Like
I get it, I do. I’m going thru two of the worst weeks of my life right now and it sucks. But I’m getting to meetings, talking to my sponsor, reading the BB, and being of service. Try it all. It will get better as long as you don’t pic up.
3 Likes
My sponsor tells me that I am as sick as my secrets. So once all those things that we have pushed away and buried deep inside come forth, more healing takes place. It’s a healthy process to go through.
It’s called “keeping it green” these memories will fade in time with the shame reducing, see them and feel them and know you’re never going back there. We cant erase the past, but we can get stronger from it. Hang in there! 16 years sober here 
1 Like
I am remorseful and genuinely sorry for the stupid sh*t I did when drunk, have made amends where possible, but at the same time I realize I have to accept the things I cannot change.
2 Likes
Stay humble and show gratitude. We must take this one day at a time. Alcohol is a serious disease. I did not choose to become an alcoholic, it chose me. Once I realized that it was up to me to take the necessary steps towards sobriety. My life got better one day at a time. AA will guide you. It gets easier… I am now 10 1/2 years sober.
2 Likes
I don't cope anymore. Working the steps with a sponsor has showed me a better way of doing things. Nowadays if something pops up from my past (or present) I inventory it, share it with my sponsor, and give it to God. Make an amends where needed. I get to take action in letting things go, this keeps me sober.
Guilt and shame is not going to help in anyway at all, if anything it will bring you back to that dark place.
Finding the strength to forgive yourself is key, ik easier said than done, but still possible. Look at your past as something you can learn and grow from, remember none of us are perfect, yet there's beauty in your imperfections and be grateful that there's something in your life that forced you to be conscious of your actions weather old or new because now you have a chance to start over and make a difference in your life and others. Some ppl don't get that opportunity.
Working the steps helps put all that garbage in the past, where it belongs.
Forgive yourself!!
1 Like
Good advice everyone
I think it’s part of the cleanse. Think about it, you’ve reflected on all that and can admit to it, but also realize that was the old you. Change can be a beautiful thing. Embrace the new you.
I still can't forgive myself. If I'm actively living in the solution and not acting in old behaviors I can accept forgiveness one day at a time.
When things like that came up for me I laugh at the thought and go "wow you where a sh$t weren't you". You must not let the past control you just be better than you were the day before and show by action you have grown as a person.
Can’t change it, I can only improve today and tomorrow.