My dad is in the hospital. Hopefully coming home on hospice Friday. That’s if he makes it that long. I have been blessed to have a great dad my whole life, and now I have to say my final goodbyes and try living a life without the only stable man whose been by my side through all of my ups and downs loving me unconditionally. I am 10 months sober, and am so scared that with this horrible struggle, will come relapse, and I really don’t want that. I don’t attend any meetings nor am I doing any kind of counseling. I’ve been pretty much doing the sober thing without any resources, and that’s what scares me. I know, “one day at a time” but I can’t help but fear I might fail. Any tips or suggestions? Thanks in advance.
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Stay sober so you can be there for your Dad. This time will be something you will be grateful for as long as you live. I spent many hours at my Dad’s bedside when he was on hospice 4 years ago and we had some of the best conversations I ever had with him. I’ve been sober for 19 years and these times are truly special.
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There’s nothing I repeat nothing worth loosing your sobriety over. Look at how far you’ve come. Those months quickly turn into years only by pausing taking a breath and remaining focused on any and everything that’s Hopeful and Positive.
Recovery Is An Amazing Journey. Enjoy the Beauty of the Progress
Feelings and Emotions are Constantly Changing. Your Much Stronger Than the Thoughts Of Relapse.
Find an Accountability Partner Check In Everyday Focus On The Good Things and Know I am here and Love You
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Hey dm me..question
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We can't do it alone. Get comfortable being uncomfortable and get to a meeting and get some numbers of some ladies to talk to. Talk to your hp,continue to talk on here don't harbor what you're going through on your own. A great thing to do is ask a lady to take you through the steps. Be honest open minded and willing. Get a home group and a tribe so when life happens and you can't go it alone you can be carried. Share at the meetings what you're going through and you'll be helped and you'll help others. It sucks dealing with life on lifes terms especially at first but we can with dignity and grace. Do the next right thing
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Im sorry to hear about your Father. I suggest trying a program of recovery. A.A. for example. It really helps in times like these. It provides suggestions to eliminate fear and offers the fellowship of others that are walking the same path.
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Thanks guys! I appreciate all of your kind words of wisdom and advice. Truly.
Get to a meeting, talk to the women. The women will be more helpful than you can imagine
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Go to a meeting. Get a sponsor. Start working the steps. Get involved in the program of recovery. Lean on the women you’ll meet there. They will be available to you to listen and to guide you. My great aunt is going into hospice soon and doesn’t have long and I also fear how I’m going to get through it without relapse. Because of this fear I have upped my meetings and been reaching out for help more. Continue reaching out for help! You can get through this sober. I’m here for you if you want to message me.
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First off I'm sorry to hear about your father. Losing a close family member and such a positive influence in your life is never an easy thing. With that said, you've made it 10 months with little to no resources, and that takes f#cking strength. I'm only 2 months in but have been doing it with no other meetings or counseling too, but this site is full of people that want to see others succeed and to succeed ourselves. Its a great community of people that will always be here when you need a shoulder, an ear or words to lift you up.
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Prayers for you and your family
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First let me just tell you how lucky you are to have that relationship with your dad you have truly been blessed saying goodbye is never easy please think bout how far you have come your doing amazing reaching out in recovery is so important and you are doing if please keep going 
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I’m going through life changing changes and challenges now and I use my fear of failure to obtain staying sober. With our world falling around us every single day we are still better sober than in active addiction. As I type I’m struggling to control myself because the anxiety is super high but finding connections with similar people helps me each and every day. I pray that all goes well for you. You are stronger than you think you are.
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Get in a meeting asap!!!
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I am praying for you now
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I’m really sorry about your dad. You don’t have to go through this alone. It’s scary, and it can feel isolating, especially if you’re trying to handle it all by yourself. Is there a reason you’re not going to meetings, either in person or online? I know leaning on others can be tough, especially early on, trust doesn’t come easy. But taking that first step might help you start trusting yourself, too. Stay strong. I’m just a DM away.
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@april316432 The brevity of life at times is hard. Count your blessings. You have one thing most of us don't ... A stable man who's been by your side ... A lot of us in recovery have that strained relationship or have the bridge that has been burnt to the ground. Cherish the time you have left with your dad.
You asked for "Any tips or suggestions" ... Well here/hear you go with my opinion.
I'm not going to sugar coat it.
- You're 311 days dry. It has been proven over and over that dry people are miserable on the inside and do relapse.
- A house without a solid foundation will fall. The same theory and principles apply to sobriety. Without support, relapse is inevitable.
- In your own words you state that you're not attending any meetings, counseling or have any resources. If you fail to plan then you plan to fail.
- Wait ... There is still hope and a solution. Both you will find in the meetings of AA. There you will, hopefully, find GOD or at least a higher power of your understanding.
- Once you're in the meetings of AA you will find, by working 12 simple suggestive steps of recovery, a plethora of women who will love on you until you can love on yourself.
I list these facts because I care. Are they harsh... You betcha. I take sobriety extremely seriously. I've been working a rigorous recovery program for over 36 years, over half my life, and have not relapsed. If we coddle you we will bury you.
In closing,
Count your blessings,
Make your bed,
Make sure your side of the street is always clean,
Enjoy and cherish your time with your dad,
Seriously consider getting involved with an AA fellowship.
Respectfully,
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You just told yourself the solution already. "I"m not going to meetings nor am I seeking counseling".
Why not!?!
It is okay to ask for help! This is why we are here, to support each other in our recovery and along our journey. You are not alone! I know the world and humans have let you down time and time again, but there are those of us who ARE able to love unconditionally and provide support without fear of judgement. Your dad sounds like a great man 
, He is not the only one out here. 🩵
You are not alone. Be willing and able to ask for help from the right resources. You are loved! You deserve to be clean and happy!!
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Masterfully written/executed. Such sound advice. I particularly resonate and appreciate the no "sugar coating". Thank you for your service.
🫡✨🩵
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I’m doing this alone too with no meetings are help. DM if you wanna talk and support one another. I’m so sorry about your dad.
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