Has anyone here had to stop drinking, due to any health issues from it and struggled? I had acute pancreatitis in December due to my HEAVY daily drinking, I was in the hospital for 5 days and so traumatized I was able to quit for almost 2 months. Then I started drinking again but definitely not as heavy, now here I am back at square one with quitting & with 2 softball sized cysts on my pancreas from it. I just don’t understand why my brain would even want to drink after something so painful, embarrassing, EXPENSIVE, and hard on not only my family but my body… I’m determined to quit somehow this time but I feel like the first step is figuring out this crazy brain:sweat_smile:
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The first step is admitting you are powerless over alcohol and your life has become unmanageable. Sounds like you have done that. The next step is getting into a recovery program. AA is where I go. But there are several different programs out there. The figuring out the crazy brain thing will come with working a program. We have all tried to do it our own way, and it didn’t work. Good luck, and I hope you find what you need to heal.
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You are correct in that your brain does play a major role in your drinking. I don’t see you mention any program of recovery, or other things you did to help you stay sober. These programs were created to help us heal both physically and mentally. I really hope you get can yourself plugged into a program! Your brain will continue to sabotage you if you don’t do something about it.
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Not anything medical but I got a DUI and I just been through too much with drinking and I had to realize enough is enough so I stopped drinking as soon as I was released from jail and haven’t touched it since
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I had health issues, lost marriage, my children taken away, 3 years prison for DWIs, and much more. None of that made a difference with my drinking. The fact of the matter is, for the real alcoholic, these reasons rarely make us want to stop. I knew I was alcoholic for years before I WANTED to stop. That didn't come from a hospital visit or prison. My bottom was a pain in my soul so significant, I wanted to kill myself. Alcohol stopped working for me. Getting drunk created anxiety attacks instead of easing my anxiety. I was scared to live, scared to die, scared to drink, and scared to get sober. Everyone's bottom is different, but when you get there you will know. Unfortunately, many of us drink ourselves to death before ever reaching our personal "bottoms." AA won't work if you don't WANT to stop. No one can do this for you. On a positive note, I never thought I'd reach a bottom. I was convinced I'd die drinking. I believe that pure misery I hit at my bottom was God entering me, and finally allowing me to feel a bottom, so that I would actually want to stop. Went from homeless and desperate, to housing my children. I get to see them everyday. I can drive them to school. I can watch them play. This change all happened in the first 3 years of sobriety. It is possible my dude. You reach out to me every time you need. This is not your fault. You were born with the disease
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For me, it's personally just exhaustion. Exhaustion at trying to moderate, finding myself drinking even when I don't want to or hadn't intended to, hiding bottles, embarrassing myself in front of others, the hangovers, the God-awful anxiety the day after. I've struggled for years and tried about everything-rehabs, AA, therapy, etc. I've only been sober less than a month, but something just clicked this time when I got on my knees and surrendered. I've always looked at quitting as a behavior change. It's really a heart change. When you're ready, you're ready. I'm rooting hard for you!
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happy you’re here
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It's a disease. You may want to consider treatment since this is actually life threatening in the now for you. I'm sorry you are going through this. It's so hard. Rehab helped me.
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Withdrawal seizures from alcohol. Pancreatitis liver disease the list goes on but there’s a solution
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My liver stopped working, my skin and eyes turned yellow, and I couldn’t keep anything down. I was vomiting blood for four days before I went to the ER. They said things like “we’ll make you as comfortable as possible” and treated me like I was going to die. 45 days after I got out of the ER I went right back to drinking. I binged for two weeks and was right back at the ER. That was 11 months ago. I haven’t drank since. I can’t. My life might be sh*t but I can’t just give up.
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I thankfully didn’t get that far down the road as to have health complications, looking back, I’m lucky. I often laughed at those close to me in life and say; See! Totally healthy! When I went to the doctor and everything came back good. I was headed towards death, no doubt.
As many have said before. This is a disease and it should be treated as such. The obsession of the mind is hard to conquer but stay connected to support systems. Whether that is a program, sponsor, sober friends, anything.
We spent more than enough time alone when we drank and felt miserable, don’t be afraid to ask for help. There are open arms if you know where to look. People who aren’t an addict of whatever variety can’t truly understand why you feel the way you do. That’s why we need likeminded people in our lives to overcome challenges, there are those of us who have found a way out.
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I am almost 4 months into my sobriety and have been in some awful pain and just found out my pancreas is not doing so well. I feel your pain. Unfortunately you just have to want it and until you’ve reached that point being on your death bed wouldn’t make a difference. Dig deep down and find your fuel for sobriety. Love yourself enough to have the better health and life that you deserve! Rock bottom is an inside job… what one addict finds devastating is another’s typical Sunday afternoon. You will be in my prayers that the strength you need finds you! Good luck
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I agree with everything Tim L said.
I'll add that the insanity of this disease is no joke. The mental obsession will have you forgetting all the negative things that have happened as a result of our drinking. That strange mental blank spot will have us in a world where we think we can have one drink and then we want more and more. The solution I found in getting a sponsor and working the 12 steps of AA.
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If you have a copy of the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous open it to page 37. Begin reading at the last paragraph. “Our behavior is as absurd”
it begins. Read from there
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AA wasn't for me, but I attend recovery Dharma meetings (Buddhist-based with, imo, less guilt/shame). AA works for some, but it's not the only answer and other answers should be presented. There's also smart recovery, lifering, refuge recovery (buddhist-based), and more that are alluding me right now. For me, was of the biggest helps was rethinking how I saw alcohol: what was it really doing for me? I did this by reading kick the drink by Jason vale and Annie grace's, this naked mind, they're basically the same approach. I began seeing there was nothing to miss, I was only gaining by not drinking. I get thoughts of drinking at times, but they're usually fleeting and that's my old mind thinking, it doesn't mean I want to do it, it's just habitual thinking. I'm not perfect but I'll 1000% take this life over my drinking life, there was nothing to miss, just drink that kept my mind and body confused. Good luck to you. Annie grace has a youtube channel too that's also very helpful. 
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Where were you able to find these meetings? I have specifically have been looking for Buddhist influenced meetings as well as mindfulness. Anything will help! Thank you in advance.
Let me find the link for recovery Dharma. Most are through zoom, you may ve able to find some in your area on person though. I found a group i like and it's a big support.
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I'm not a big fan of refuge recovery because their founder was found to be guilty of some sexual related crimes, not sure what it was, but I don't support that so I go to the group that broke off from that: recovery Dharma 
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I went into liver failure and needed a transplant 1.5 yrs after getting sober. I did both AA and intensive counseling with a psychiatric nurse turned counselor that specialized in addiction. I have been sober and in recovery a little over 5 yrs.
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I highly, highly recommend Annie Grace’s Program This Naked Mind. Her methodology is about your feelings & beliefs whereas, AA & other programs only focus on your behavior. You are considered a success or “cured” as long as you stop drinking without investigating in the false beliefs that caused you to start drinking in the 1st place!. I read her books This Naked Mind & The Alcohol Experiment. I have the This Naked Mind Companion app on my phone (it’s free). Annie Grace also has a lot of free videos on YouTube. I am currently in her 90 day program called The Path which was not free but is totally worth it. Please check it out because it help your subconscious get rid of the cognitive dissonance
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