Right now I’m struggling with my relationship of 3 years to my bf and his addiction to heroine. Were both 29 and been living together for 2 years, he’s been addicted for about 8-10 years? I really really wanna stay and help him but I keep feeling like he doesn’t care or prioritize my needs.. it’s like I’m waiting for a big sign that tells me to stay or to go. My heart and head are torn and I have no clue what to do. It sucks feeling stuck not knowing what to do… I’m not an addict or a recovering one.. I was an alcoholic and at times fight myself on not drinking.. but for the most part my life has been normal.
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I realize that it is, feels tough…while from what you have shared, Brooke…you need to leave this relationship.
…I am unsure what ah, “ bigger “ signs you require, Brooke?
You really do not need a sign, you need to get out of this.
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A part of me needs/ wants to leave. But the other major part of me screams no
Go to a Alanon meeting
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I’m going to my first one tomorrow
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Is there one for heroine or is that the same cause it’s a substance ?
A drug is a drug, just keep coming back to Alanon,it works
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I found one near me and I pray it works! Thank you!
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It's suggested to go to at least 6 meetings before you decide whether or not Alanon is for you, please do at least that much, you won't regret it!
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Ugh Brooke, I'm so sorry to hear you're struggling with this, and it sounds like there is loss either way you go. I would ultimately say you need to put your oxygen mask on first, and it sounds like your gut already knows what's best. Sending you strength and courage 
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Thank you!
I’m gonna put the work in and try to
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Brooke it’s beautiful that you want to stay and help. But I’ve seen this situation many times. It’s best to save yourself and get super solid on your sobriety. Then you might have a chance at helping him and others.
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Get the fück out. I was an addict until 2006, for 11 years. There was no helping me until I was ready. I was toxic. Get the heII out.
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You are jeopardizing your serenity, and most of all your sobriety. He will bring you down before you bring him out. Leave. What other sign do u need. I was in his place my ex had 33 years clean and I started getting high at home. She got tired and left. It was the best thing to happen to and for me. God doesn’t need your help, helping him.
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Help yourself and run. This is a selfish program. Please go…
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Best of luck to you, Brooke. Glad you’re going to Al-anon. I think the suggestion to try multiple meetings is a really good one. Whatever you choose, having the support of others who have been there will be so helpful.
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ALANON is a great idea.
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You CAN do both. Helping him could be cathartic for you as well. You can leave the romantic aspects of the relationship aside and just be the good friend that helps him get clean. Then who knows what's down the road for the two of you. It could be the wake up call he needs without just putting him off completely.
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